TheVampiresStudentII: Friends&Fiends of the Night
by The Vampires Student
Summary: The halfvampiress Gillian leaves her master Larten Crepsley, because he refused to make her a full vampire and gives herself into the hands of Gavner Purl. But was that the right decision?
1. Chapter 1: special needs

**The Vampires Student Part II:  
>"Friends and Fiends of the Night"<strong>

Chapter 1: "Special needs"  
><span>  
>Gillian sat in the back of the sleek black car and stared silently out the window. Gavner Purl, who sat beside her, had the decency and sensitivity to leave her in peace.<br>It was a long drive.  
>Their silence was only accompanied by the asthmatic breathing of the vampire. They had left the city lights behind them, and the car was sliding a long time on straight roads through the darkness, when Purl cleared his throat.<br>"How did he take it?"  
>He – that was Larten Crepsley, and the question fully outspoken would be: How has Larten Crepsley taken it that you, Gillian, have left him to finish your apprenticeship with Gavner Purl?<br>"Surprisingly conceived." Gillian played over and over in her mind, what her vampire master had said and done, when she had opened to him a few hours ago, that she would leave him. "He has made bare moves to stop me."  
>To say it out loud, made it even worse.<br>It was true.  
>What had he done to stop her?<br>It gave her a pang, as she recalled his face. So calm and unmoved.  
>"Do nothing out of it, dear," said the Gavner and patted her knee.<br>Gillian forced a smile, and then faced the window.  
>The old vampire took the hint. He took his hand away from her knee and leaned forward to the driver: "What are you doing? Why do you drive over the bridge, the road is too bad, you will damage the car! "<br>"But we save several miles this way."  
>"I don`t care. Take the street around the bridge. I can not stand the rumble of the wheels. "<br>"As you wish, Sir."  
>Gillian barely registered that the car slowed and turned around.<br>She stared into her own face, reflected pale in the black window.  
>Her large dark eyes looked sadly at her under black bangs.<br>She could not bear it long and looked away.  
>She could not even look herself in the eyes anymore.<p>

After an eternity, like it seemed to her, the car drove into a curving driveway and stopped beside a fountain, which, however, was not working, in front of a big mansion. The driver got out and opened first the door for Gillian, and then for Gavner Purl.  
>The old vampire beau took her hand and smiled: "Impressed?"<br>Gillian looked up at the facade of the house, ornate and entwined with ivy. Behind each of the hundreds of windows a light burned for her welcoming.  
>"Wow. It's a beautiful house. And so big. "<br>"Of course. More rooms than I need. You see, I have enough space for a small student. Shall we? "And he offered her his arm.  
>Gillian slipped her arm under his and he led her up the many steps to the entrance.<br>The driver followed them, with Gillian's little luggage under his arm. He pulled out a huge bunch of keys and unlocked the portal.  
>Gillian felt like Cinderella in a fairy tale, as the old vampire took her to his house. Everything she saw was amazing: the great curving staircase that led to an upstairs gallery, and the darkened oil paintings on the walls, the huge chandelier which softly strummed, as a breeze from the entrance portal made it swing, the sight of an adjacent room full of antique furniture.<br>"If you would please follow me, Miss," the driver said, pointing up the stairs.  
>Gillian let go the arm of Gavner, who breathed a kiss on her hand before he retreated into the adjacent chambers.<br>Gillian hastened up the stairs and followed the driver into countless corridors and hallways into the bowels of the house. When they finally arrived at her room, she asked herself, how she ever should find her way back. Any normal person would have problems to find the way in this huge house, but Gillian was not used to have solid walls around her at all.  
>Most of the time Gillian and Larten Crepsley had lived in a tent or a trailer, and her time as a human she had spent in a small apartment.<br>"If you need something or have questions, ring for me," said the driver, after he had put her bag beside an bed.  
>And what a bed!<br>Such enormous beds Gillian only knew from television: it was a huge four-poster bed with posts at each corner that supported a canopy of heavy midnight-blue velvet.  
>Gillian breathed an overwhelmed "thank you" before the man closed the door behind her and left her alone.<br>The room had a connecting door leading to a parlor, with chairs and a comfortable-looking sofa, and it bordered on a private bathroom.  
>Gillian was enthusiastic about the tub and immediately filled it with hot water and squeezed almost a full pack of bathing soap into it. She sniffed at the many creams and soaps and perfumes, which were neatly lined up on a shelf, ready for her.<br>She slipped out of her shabby dress, carelessly let it drop to the floor, and tentatively dipped a toe into the bath.  
>The water was way too hot, and therefore just right for her.<br>Slowly, she climbed into the tub and gleefully plunged into a mountain of suds.  
>Sighing, she closed her eyes in the hot water.<br>That was exactly what she needed.  
>In her life with Larten Crepsley she often had to settle with a cold shower or a just a cat wash. Sometimes there was not even that for days, when they were forced to stay in cemeteries or in dilapidated old houses.<br>The Cirque had offered more convenience and comfort, but the showers were built makeshift in a trailer and however nothing at all like THIS.  
>"I could have had this much sooner," Gillian thought and grinned.<br>Then she dipped her head under the water and disappeared in the foam.


	2. Chapter 2: Pure morning

Chapter 2: "Pure Morning"

As Gillian woke up the next day, because a ray of sunlight shone through the large windows and tickled her nose, she did not know for a moment, where she was.

Then she remembered everything.

What time was it? She had to admit, she had not slept so soft and comfortable since long ago.

Yawning, she stretched her arms and legs with relish like a cat. Then she pulled herself together and swung her legs out of bed. Barefooted she padded across the plushy carpet in search of her clothes. She found her dress on the bathroom floor where she had left it lying yesterday, and picked it up to get inside.

Suddenly she was ashamed of the old worn-out cloth, even if she had always liked it, but in this magnificent environment, it felt shabby and inappropriate.

She stuck her head out the door and looked down the long corridor. Damn, she could not even remember from which direction they had come last night.

If she wanted to not hopelessly get lost in these labyrinthine corridors, she had no other choice than to ring after Mr Telton, who had been presented to her as the driver.

It was a strange feeling to pull the old-fashioned cord, and listen to the distant sound of a bell in the house.

She felt silly.

For a while nothing happened, then there was a knock at her door and Gillian opened for the driver by last night, a little embarrassed.

"Good morning, miss. Did you sleep well? "

"Yes, very well, thank you."

"Well, then I suggest that I bring you to your breakfast."

The driver led Gillian through the house, and she tried to memorize the route.

A view out of one of the many windows hardly helped her for orientation, because she could not say where in the house she was, and a sunlit lawn spread out to all sides bordered by trees.

He led her down into a spacious kitchen, which probably once had legions of servants working in it, but now was no longer in use. A breakfast was prepared for her there, everything covered with blankets and potholders to keep it warm for her.

Gillian sat down somewhat embarrassed and the driver took a pot of steaming coffee from which he also poured a cup for himself, and sat down with her.

Gillian tucked in. Never before had anyone made such a perfect breakfast for her, with hard-boiled eggs and warm croissants and real butter and marmalade and just with everything.

"Bon appétit, Miss," said the driver.

Gillian wiped a few crumbs from her mouth and swallowed.

"Have you prepared this?"

"Certainly. I take care of everything here."

"All alone?", asked Gillian.

"Well, there comes a room maid once a week. The house is huge, you know. But I am the only one who takes care about the concerns of his Lordship."

He blew into his coffee, took another sip, and looked very smug.

Gillian wondered how much he knew.

Did he knew that his lord of this house was a vampire?

Probably, because that`s the only way he could take care of the special needs of the Gavner.

Not all vampires had servants who were privy to the secret.

Some, however, had gathered faithful helpers. These assistants were often half-vampires, so they could provide their lord and master better. Was this man a half-vampire, just like them?

She watched his face carefully.

No, Gillian did not think Mr Telton was a half-vampire. He smelled too human.

Gillian swallowed as the scent of his warm human blood became clearly aware to her and quickly stuffed another piece of cheese into her mouth to distract herself.

"And what am I supposed to do?" asked Gillian chewing. She was suddenly aware that she had no idea what would be her tasks in the household of the old vampire. With Larten she had known what to do.

But here? What did the Gavner expect of her?

She suddenly had the feeling to be useless and not wanted, because Mr Telton made all the necessary work, and certainly since a long time. He didn`t need her help, she was only in the way of him and brought him extra work.

"First of all, you will be driving to the city, Miss".

"The city?". She didn`t want to return to the city, she had just escaped the city.

"Yes. For shopping." He reached into the side pocket of his impeccable suit, pulled out an envelope and shoved it to her across the table.

Gillian frowned and looked at the envelope. It contained a gold credit card.

"What ...?"

"His Lordship wants you to outfit yourself. He wants you to know, that there is no reason to hold back. Miss needs a complete make over. "

Gillian stared and fingered the little gold plastic card in her hand.

"But I can`t ..."

"It is his explicit wish, Miss," said Mr Telton and rose. "If you are ready, then we can go."

He took a car key from a long line of keys from a hook on the wall and Gillian followed him in kind of a trance out of the house to the car.

Mr Telton drove the black Mercedes with tinted windows all the way back to the city and to the fanciest shopping districts.

They went from shop to shop in stores that Gillian would never have dared to enter on her own. She could not help but feel like Julia Roberts in the movie "Pretty Woman" as she handed an elegant evening gown for the next to try on, and Mr Telton every time gave the little gold card to the seller without hesitating.

With every new dress she wondered, if this would be the dress in which she would be made a vampire, and she could not help to feel, like a bride looking for THE dress.

But the initial enthusiasm faded, when with every dream in satin, that Mr Telton held out to her, she began to feel more and more inadequate and less of a person. She just didn`t fit into these clothes, and the dizzyingly high-heeled shoes that the sellers offered her frightened her.

Would she walk around in such things for the rest of the time?

So she said to Mr Telton, "I think I have enough evening dresses". The outfits had begun to resemble, and not one of them had pleased her, or felt unique enough to be THE dress.

Mr Telton looked at her carefully, but then to Gillian's relief he agreed.

"Time to let your hair done."

Oh no, why ? Gillian liked her long black mane. Admitted, it had not been cut for ages ... but did she really want a different hairstyle?

She did not dare to contradict and followed Mr Telton in a salon where a crowd of excitedly chattering chicks with far too much make-up went to work on her, cut her hair, pinned it up, manicured her hands and feet and made a little nasty treatment called "face peeling".

After this procedure, and after a layer of "light Evening Makeup", Gillian looked in the mirror and could not recognize herself anymore.

Mr Telton seemed satisfied and insisted that she stayed with one of the new dresses on. Gillian could only come by that her old dress was put in a bag, and not left behind, certainly thrown in the trash.

Gillian was exhausted and tired, but Mr Telton was far from finished.

When she mentioned that it was enough for today, he enumerated a long list of what they needed even more: from underwear to jewelry to handbags and perfumes and skin care products.

Involuntarily Gillian stumbled on her new high heels behind him.

When Mr. Telton, laden with bags and packages, very much later took the way back towards the parking lot, Gillian was immensely relieved.

On the ride back, she sat between her captured goods, and was not able to rejoice.

She saw that the sun approached the horizon, and her heart began to pound.

Would Gavner Purl be pleased with her?

She looked at herself in the rearview mirror when the driver did not pay attention.

She looked like a lady.

But would she be able to act like one as well?

Gillian was painfully aware of her lowly origins and her lack of knowledge in etiquette.

Hopefully I will not make a fool of myself ... thought Gillian and the black car carried her through the twilight towards the house of her new vampire master.


	3. Chapter 3: second sight

Chapter 3: "Second Sight"

Back in the room that had been assigned to her (she was afraid to call it "her" room), Gillian put the new clothes neatly in the wardrobe. Her own clothes, which she had brought with her, stayed untouched in the bagpack, which she pushed under the bed. Suddenly she got her hands on the package with the boots, that Larten had presented her. She crushed the silky paper.  
>She had not even tried them on.<br>She gulped.  
>Determined, she stuffed the boots without unpacking them deep inside the big closet and shut the door.<p>

The saloon in the ground floor was lighted by innumerable candles, and a small fire flickered in the cozy marble fireplace, where Gillian was asked by Mr Telton to come down after sunset. "Master Purl wishes your accompany."  
>Well, Master Purl was not present yet, and Gillian strolled through the room, fingering the fabric of furniture and tapestry, admiring a vase on a small chest of drawers and felt terrible misplaced the whole time.<br>Gavner Purl entered the room, dressed impeccably in a suit with an embroidered monogram on his chest. He walked with outstretched arms towards Gillian and gave her a smacking kiss on the cheek left and right, panting loudly: "My love! Look at this. Mr Telton, I must applaud you, you have done wonders ".  
>Mr Telton standing by the door bowed.<br>Hello, don`t boast, thought Gillian. Wonders? As if it would have been that bad before.  
>Aloud, she said: "I thank you, Gavner". And she had to endure that the old vampire beau turned her around to look at her from all sides.<br>He tugged at his mustache and snorted: "A bit too much eyeliner, my love, but otherwise quite acceptable."  
>Gillian could not help but blushed a bit.<br>What was he thinking?  
>As if she had painted herself.<br>Angry at the chicks from the salon, she tried to cover up her embarrassment by going to the sideboard and reached for the carafe filled with red liquid.  
>Mr Telton was immediately by her side and took with a disapproving glance the glass from her hands. He made it very clear, that he alone had the right to pour the vampire his drink.<br>As you like, thought Gillian.  
>She shrugged her shoulders, and went to one of the armchairs next to the fire, to sit down.<br>She wondered again what was expected of her.  
>When she had been a student of Larten Crepsley, she had taken care of everything that the vampire could not do during the daylight. These tasks are taken over here by Mr Telton. For the first time Gillian wondered how Darren Shan had felt when he had come to Larten and her.<br>Useless and unwelcome?  
>"I hope your day was a pleasure. I'm sure you've returned with an armful of clothes. "<br>"Yes, Gavner, and I thank you for your generosity."  
>But the vampire barely listened, he took the glass from Mr Telton and said to him: "Did you go to Prada? I find that they have quite a few delightful new bolero jackets in their collection. Oh, and Tiffany. You surely have gone to Tiffany's? "<br>"Of course, if only briefly. It was not much time, we had to do a manicure as well, "said Mr Telton, as though he always did this kind of chitchat with the old vampire.  
>Gavner Purl nodded sympathetically and ran his finger over the traced lines of his carbon black mustache.<br>Vain dandy, thought Gillian, and had to suppress a giggle at the idea of Larten Crepsley entering one of these posh shops. He would be a fine appearance in his worn out red coat, and Gillian imagined a saleswoman fainting at the sight of the scar that ran across his face.  
>Gavner Purl looked at her her and Gillian turned her giggle quickly into a cough.<br>"All right, my dear? That comes from the soot. Telton the chimney smokes, I always say. "  
>"Yes, sir," said Telton and began to take care of the fireplace.<br>Gillian straightened her dress and took up all her courage. "Master Purl?"  
>It was hard for her to dub him as a master. It felt wrong.<br>"Master Purl, I thank you very much for the warm welcome in your home, and for all the gifts today. But I would like to know when we start."  
>"Start?" The vampire looked at her in amazement.<br>"Well, with my transformation."  
>"My dear, you have only just arrived. And you still have so much to learn. "<br>Gillian frowned. "I assure you, I'm ready."  
>"No, not at all. You are far from being ready. "<br>"What?" Gillian sprang up, so that her earrings swung fiercely. "Do you want to test me? I'll show you what I've learned! I can move nearly soundless, I flitt fast ! I can sneak on humans, and drink, without them being aware what`s going on! I've learned to fight and use my fingernails as a weapon! I can heal my wounds and make... "  
>Gavner Purl waved impatiently. "Yes, yes, no one doubted that. Certainly, my old friend Crepsley had shown you all these wonderful abilities. "<br>"But why don`t you then ..."  
>"Well, there's more than fight and sneak and scurry around in the dark, isn`t it?"<p>

He calmly drained his glass and held it then stretched out, so Telton took it and quickly filled it up again.  
>"There's more?". Gillian was confused. Had Larten withhold her something?<br>"Well, first of all there is the knowledge how to _behave_." Purl pursed his lips, and threw a glance at Telton, who softly chuckled.  
>Gillian's whole body began to tremble.<br>But she pulled herself together and sat down again.  
>"That's better." Purl took the glass and exchanged amused glances with Telton.<br>"We're not in the circus, little Gillian, the vagabond life has an end. And I`m known for not making hasty decisions. Above all, I`m known, not to transform my new students in a hurry. "  
>"I'm a half vampire since fifteen years! There can be no talking about rashing!", said Gillian upset.<br>"In the time I come from, a master used to have his students fifty years with him, before they received the gift."  
>Fifty years? Gillian felt a heat.<br>"But we had a deal! You have promised that ... "  
>"I promised that I will carry over, what Larten had begun. Namely your education. And I see that you are far away from the end of your training, you have a lot to learn. "<br>"Purl ..."  
>"Shush. I want to hear no more. Mr Telton, would you be kind enough to bring Miss Gillian back to her room?"<br>Telton bowed, and Gillian had no choice, but to do as she was told, and to follow the man back upstairs.


	4. Chapter 4: Without you I am nothing

Chapter 4: "Without you I am nothing"

Once she was alone, she tore off her earrings and threw them into one corner of the room.  
>Even the dress she tore off and dropped it unceremoniously to the ground.<br>In the bathroom she scrubbed the makeup from her face until her skin was glowing red.  
>Gavner Purl had lied to her.<br>Oh, not in what he was saying, he had made sure that his words in one way or the other were open for interpretations. He would never allow to get caught at a word break.  
>But he had lied with the meaning.<br>He knew very well that she meant to be transformed as soon as possible.  
>Not in ten or twenty or thirty years.<br>She wanted it in the next few DAYS.  
>Ok, she had said nothing about time limits when she had burst into Mr Talls trailer without knocking, and begged Gavner Purl to accept her as his student.<br>Not with exact words.  
>But, damn, he had known very well.<br>This treacherous vampire!  
>She pulled out the bag pack from under the bed and took out some wide pants and a hooded sweater. Then she crawled into the bed.<br>Fifty years? Could she bear to spend another fifty years with this fob? She hated his fake tan face and his silly beard already. What could he teach her?  
>She would become like a trained monkey if she stayed with him.<br>Disgusted, she looked around the room with the four poster bed.  
>Had this all impressed her?<br>All this pomp and the beautiful dresses and elegant poses.  
>She laughed dryly.<br>Come on, Gillian, this is not you.  
>She remembered the Cirque du Freak with longing. Had she not there always been able to be herself?<br>She and Larten, it had gone fine for them.  
>Ok, sometimes the money had been really tight, they couldn't perform, had been chased away or persecuted by the authorities and harassed by the police. And even if Gillian did get along with most of the people, who traveled with the Cirque, she had somehow never really been a full part of it.<p>

She and Larten, they were in the end not really freaks.  
>They were vampires, or at least Gillian would be one soon too, and that permanent life on the run had been depressing.<br>Gavner Purl took another way. He has this house and servants, against whom he does not have to hide.  
>Oh, Larten. Gillian suddenly missed her master vampire almost physically. She pulled the hood over her head and slipped deeper under the blanket.<p>

How might Larten get along without her?  
>Would Darren take good care of him?<br>Of course not, the silly boy had no idea.  
>He has only been a few weeks with them.<br>Suddenly it occurred to her, that the boy has not even been there when the circus went on and packed everything up.  
>Would Darren know how to pack the tent, stow everything and ensure that Lartens coffin was guarded during the daylight?<br>Did he know how his vampire master sheltered from the sun by day, and what he should do if they ran into a police check?  
>Damn, Gillian, you left Larten alone with this teenager, and it is your fault, that he is trained so poorly.<br>Larten ... forgive me, I've done something stupid.

Gillian sobbed, and hid her face in the wide hood of her sweater.  
>A faint smell after patchouli wafted from the fabric.<br>Lartens odor.  
>Gillian moaned in agony.<br>Here was no place for her.  
>She should return to Larten.<br>She remembered Larten's face, his piercing eyes under orange-red hair, the scar across his cheek.  
>How would he react when she comes back?<br>"_Can you forgive an old vampire his weak heart?"_  
>This had Larten said to her when she went away.<br>But what exactly had he meant?  
>She had thought, that he meant, he was too weak to transform her.<br>But was that true?  
>She saw his stinging eyes in her memory again.<br>What he had meant when he said, he could not turn her?  
>Did he really not bring himself to do it?<br>Why not? What exactly happened at a transformation between the vampire and the student?  
>Gillian remembered vividly how the vampire had exchanged his blood for the first time with her. It was short and painful, but she had felt long afterwards in a strange way connected with him.<br>And then the other day, when she had crawled to him in the coffin and drank a tiny drop of him ... A warm feeling rushed through her when she remembered it.  
>If the transformation will be like that, then Gillian longed for it very much.<br>But Larten did not.  
>Well, at least not with her, he will probably turn Darren some day, she thought sarcastically, and her stomach clenched.<br>And she had thought she could do this with the Gavner.  
>A brief moment, a brief pain, and she would finally be a vampire. It would not be Lartens blood, but no matter, she would <em>be like him<em>.  
>Now she was no longer sure whether she wanted this type of connection to Gavner Purl. Vampire or not.<br>But she could not go back to Larten as well.  
>She could not go anywhere.<br>It has always been like that.  
>Gillian had no home and no one to trust or who did hold to her.<br>Gillian was a halfvampiress without a master, and thus no hope of ever becoming a full vampire.  
>And she did something she had never ever wanted to do again.<br>She cried herself to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5: every me and every you

Chapter 5: "Every me and every you"

Since hours Gillian wandered aimlessly through the streets.  
>She had no idea where to go. Neither could she go back to Larten Crepsley, nor could she stay with Gavner Purl.<br>She had just walked downstairs into the kitchen of the large mansion, had taken the car keys from the hook, and ran away with the car.  
>Although she had no driver's license, there had never been enough money for it when she was still a human, but she knew how to drive.<br>Now the car was parked somewhere randomly on the roadside, Gillian was not even sure if she could find it back.  
>She simply stopped and got out, and since then has been traveling on foot.<p>

She didn`t look at any shop windows.  
>She was wearing her old dress, but for some reason she felt no longer really well in it.<br>Could it be that she no longer felt comfortable in her own skin?  
>As twilight came, she wondered, what would the Gavner do, when he found out, that she had stolen the car and hit the road.<br>Would he try to find her?  
>Probably.<br>Would he contact the Cirque, to ask if she had appeared there?  
>Probably.<br>Gillian sighed.  
>Then it was only a matter of time until Larten knew it.<br>And until they went looking for her.  
>She suspected the vampire master had ways and means to locate her.<br>But Gillian did not want to be found.  
>She shuddered at the thought of what Larten would say. Would he send her back to Gavner Purl, like a naughty pet dog?<p>

Was it fate or her subconscious that she finally turned her steps towards the bridge?  
>When Gillian realized, where she was, she thought: How ironic. Here it all started. Perhaps here it should all end?<br>She did not hesitate and stepped onto the bridge on which she had met Larten Crepsley for the very first time.  
>The bridge was very long and designed for two-lane traffic, though there was not much cars. For pedestrians, there was a kind of emergency catwalk, but it was not allowed to walk across the bridge on foot. The bridge was to be entered only in exceptional cases, for example if your car broke. The river rushed far below her, a sharp gust hit Gillian from the first moment, and made her black hair flapping behind her like a pirate flag.<br>The dusk had set in, and Gillian felt that the orange sun approached the horizon.  
>Gillian remembered exactly how it has been.<br>How she had been.

When she had met the vampire for the first time, she had been standing on the railing of the bridge, ready to jump.  
>She had been twenty-two years young and had nothing to lose. She had no job, no education, no university degree.<br>No father.  
>But a mother suffering from alcoholism.<br>She had lived up to her sixteenth birthday with her mother, and had watched helplessly how the mother lost even the simplest job, simply because she was always drunk. There was never money, and often they had felt cold, dirty and hungry in their small apartment, because once again the electricity or the heating was turned off.  
>At such times her mother drank more than ever.<br>Gillian skipped school to earn some money in cheap fast food restaurants or in seedy bars, only to realize, that her mother found the hiding place behind the tank and all money was spent on vodka.  
>Earlier her mother had beaten her when she had opened her mouth, as the mother called it, then, as Gillian grew older and stronger, she struck back.<br>Finally the day came where they had been particularly in a bad state, and the owner of the apartment had seriously threatened to put them on the street, if they did not pay their arrears.  
>When Gillian came back home in the morning, tired and bruised, with a few dollars in the bag she had earned somewhere as an helper (but not nearly enough), she caught her mother in bed with a man.<br>She had sold the last thing in the apartment that was still of value: her own body.  
>Gillian realized that she would be better off without her mother, and ran away.<br>She had been sixteen years old.  
>Because she had no friends, she lived on the street, sleeping in the closets of the bars where she worked until she got caught or stayed in empty houses.<br>She did not complain, all in all it was better than it had been with her mother.  
>Then after a while, things went better.<br>The owner of a club allowed her to sleep in a back room when he learned of her situation, and she began to earn enough to get along at some extent.  
>Finally she found a small room all to herself, and every month paid her bills proudly.<br>But that was the problem.  
>Should this be all?<br>She earned enough to survive until each end of a month, and sometimes she could save, a little bit, but nothing more.  
>Her life was stuck in a dead end.<br>Although this was no longer the street, but the thought of the next twenty, even forty years going on like this, horrified her.  
>At night she walked around in discos and bars, and danced until dawn, to numb herself.<br>From alcohol, which was always accessible in huge quantities, she stayed away. Although she was often invited for a drink, she always refused, or took a Coke.  
>And she was often invited by men, who tried to get into a conversation with her, or they simply watched her with greedy eyes, when she danced absentmindedly.<br>She never gave in to one of them.  
>Sure, one time or another, she had smooched with someone, yes, she even had been a couple with someone for a while.<br>But whenever a boy wanted more from her, she had fled.

Then, that night, she had been flirting with a guy who had been staring at her all evening. The guy thought he was a very big hit, and Gillian had enjoyed it, to heat him up, and then leave. Had she known how dangerous that was?  
>Of course, she was not stupid.<br>It was rather that she was looking for the danger.  
>After she gave the guy a rebuff and made him look stupid in front of his friends, she had made her way home alone on the dark streets, her heart had started to pound, as the guy and his company followed her in a dark alley.<br>Started to pound with joy.  
>Gillian loved to play with fire.<br>These were the only moments in her life where she felt alive.  
>She had felt the adrenaline rushing through her body, and with a happy grin on her face she had to pull herself together, in order not to laugh like crazy.<br>Instead, she had launched an arrogant expression, and began to taunt the guy.  
>Only when he became violent, and the adrenaline was transformed into real fear, Gillian realized that she had gone too far this time, and that she was in real danger.<br>She drew her knife, ready to defend herself to death.  
>The men had been reluctant to do anything, when they saw the resolute face of the little woman, and how safe she went with the folding knife in a ready to fight position.<br>Their hesitation gave Gillian the crucial advantage: She gave one of the guys a kick in the balls, and the other a hefty cut in the arm, then ran away like the wind.  
>She escaped, as the men made no attempt to follow her.<br>Gillian felt great.  
>Invincible.<br>She laughed out loud.  
>She had never felt so good in life.<p>

So how come that Larten Crepsley found this intrepid young woman a little later standing on the railing of a bridge, ready to jump?  
>What had happened, why did she wanted to kill herself?<br>Well, the answer is this: She had not wanted to kill herself.  
>She had just sought another kick.<br>When the elation subsided together with the adrenaline in her blood, Gillian couldn`t allow this.  
>She didn`t want to feel again as before, so lifeless and stuck in a cage.<br>She wanted to be alive and capable of anything.  
>Invincible.<br>When she arrived at the road bridge, she entered it, because the slight swaying and the view of the raging abyss underneath had caused her a pleasant and familiar tingling in the stomach.  
>It was like an addiction.<br>Finally, she took off her shoes and climbed onto the narrow railing to challenge the threat.  
>Gillian remembered exactly how great she had felt, as the wind tugged and pulled at her, and called her.<br>Called her, to let herself go and jump.  
>She knew she could do that.<br>The idea was tempting.  
>To jump, with the wind in her hair.<br>Like flying.  
>Simply let go of everything.<br>Once have full control over your own life.  
>Gillian had looked down.<br>The butterflies in your stomach must be overwhelming at such a jump.

Suddenly she had sensed that someone was watching her.  
>She had turned her head and saw him for the first time<br>The man stood a few yards away and looked at her curiously, as if thinking about what kind of species she might be.  
>And Gillian wondered the same thing.<br>Fascinated, she stared at the scar that ran across the man's face, his white skin, shining in the moonlight, and the long red cloak, spread by the wind like wings behind him.  
>The man had made a bow, and lifted his top hat, so that a tuft of orange-red hair came to light.<br>Without a smile or saying something, he had drawn a green piece of paper from the hat and handed it Gillian.  
>Puzzled Gillian had taken the green paper, and gave a look.<br>It was a ticket for the Cirque du Freak.  
>As she looked up again, the man had disappeared.<br>Gillian had struggled with her balance and almost fell into the deep.  
>She had been frightened to death when the man was gone so suddenly.<br>Panting, she reached for one of the steel cables that spanned the bridge and with beating hearts, she climbed off the railing, until she had solid ground under her feet.  
>No trace of the man.<br>Here was nothing, where he could disappear so quickly.  
>Had she been hallucinating?<br>Everything had seemed so surreal.  
>If not for the piece of paper in her hand, she was still clutching it.<p>

So Gillian went to a show of the Cirque du Freak.  
>And became a student of Mr Crepsleys.<p>

Now, fifteen years later, Gillian reached the same place on the same bridge, on which railings she once had stood.  
>She looked down.<br>The river was far below her.  
>A jump down would mean death for every human.<br>And for a half-vampire?  
>Gillian did not know, but it was more than likely that her body would be shattered on impact with water from that height.<br>She had heard that water could be as hard as concrete.  
>She watched as the sun disappeared behind the skyline of the buildings, and familiar darkness fell upon her.<br>If Larten should find her, then he could just as well do it here.  
>Running away was meaningless.<br>What in the end had any meaning ?  
>What had years at the side of the vampire brought her?<br>At first she had felt alive, finally.  
>Larten had offered her a life that she had always yearned for, full of excitement and danger.<br>With him all her wishes had been fulfilled.  
>Or not?<br>After the first exciting years full of new discoveries, what came then?  
>Was it not also a kind of deadly routine?<br>Gillian had started to get bored, even if she had never admitted that until now.  
>When had she felt alive the last time?<br>She would never feel alive, not until she became finally like _him_.

Gillian kicked the shoes off her feet, and climbed onto the railing.

She knew now what to do.  
>Either Larten Crepsley would finally agree to turn her into a vampire, or she would put an end to all this. Definitively.<br>She would jump.

Come on, Larten, come and get me, thought Gillian concentrated.  
>You know, where I am.<br>Come here, Larten.  
>Let's bring this to an end.<p> 


	6. Chapter 6: something rotten

Chapter 6: "Something Rotten"

The half-vampire Gillian stood on the railing of the bridge on which she once had met Larten Crepsley for the first time.  
>She was barefoot, and held firmly with one hand on a thick steel cable, while the wind tugged at her.<br>While she waited, she pulled the darkness closer around her, so that she wasn`t visible for one or the other random car passing by.  
>She closed her eyes and listened to the wind, the roar of the water somewhere deep under her and her own pounding heartbeat. She dreamed of Larten, and longed for him to come.<br>What would he do if she jumped?  
>She had asked this herself many times.<br>What would he have done if she had jumped past then?  
>Would he have saved her?<br>Gillian often dreamed of this past moment on the bridge.  
>In her imagination Larten did not just suddenly appear to hand her over a ticket, in her dream she had jumped and the vampire had jumped too, after her, to save her. She did not simply climb down on her own, no, she lied in the strong arms of the vampire and looked up to her rescuer, looked into his eyes for the very first time ...<br>That would have been romantic.  
>Gillian could feel a warm tingling sensation in her stomach as she gave away to her favorite fantasy.<br>Perhaps her favorite fantasy could come true after all?  
>This time, she would jump.<br>And the vampire would have to jump after her, because he loves her.  
>Or he would not jump and let her die, because he doesn`t love her, had never loved her, but just kept her, because it was so comfortable.<br>That was what troubled Gillian deep inside, what always tortured her.  
>She wanted to know, needed to know.<br>Does Larten Crepsley love her?  
>She will find out now once and for all.<p>

The small figure of the halfvampiress fluttered in the wind, like a piece of cloth that had become entangled in the steel construction; for human eyes hardly more than a scrap of a dress and dark night. The crescent-shaped moon appeared behind a cloud, when Gillian heard heavy boot steps on the metal catwalk.  
>Finally.<br>Her heart began to pound more excitedly.  
>Larten, he had come.<br>Gillian took a deep breath, but the smile that began to widen on her face, froze. With the breath, the smell of the man came to her.  
>That was not Larten.<br>Gillian reacted half a second too late.  
>When her senses perceived the foul smell, she wanted to turn around, flit back on the bridge.<br>But the man was already at her before she had completed only half the movement.  
>Everything was slowed down, as if someone switched a DVD at half-speed on, only she ran at normal speed.<br>And unfortunately, the man too.  
>He was in a split of a second next to her.<br>And pushed her off the bridge.

Gillian held her breath as she felt her feet slipping off the railing.  
>Her stomach made a delicious leap.<br>Her arms were rowing in the air and her hands were desperately looking for something to hold on.  
>With wide eyes she stared into the face of the man.<br>Murlough.  
>Her fingers scraped along on his arm, with which the vampaneze had just pushed her, and she managed to claw the fabric of his jacket.<br>Her body fell, and her hand slid down his arm down to his wrist.  
>But she did not let go.<br>A jolt went through her body, as the time snapped back into its normal speed, and Gillian's cry yelled through the night.  
>She dangled with one arm to the hand of the vampaneze over a black abyss ... and the jolt as the weight of her body suddenly pulled her down, had just dislocated her arm.<br>"Hi, sweetness."  
>From watery eyes Gillian looked up at the man.<br>Murlough grinned nastily down at her and cocked his head.  
>"Did I come at a bad time?".<br>He laughed a hoarse laugh, which sounded more like a bark.  
>Little flashes danced in front of Gillian's eyes. She had difficulties not to faint. The pain in her arm was unbearable and one part of her begged, he should let go, so pain stopped.<br>The other part was trying desperately to find a way out.  
>He will not let go, this voice said deep inside her. He could have done already.<br>"Murlough ...", Gillian squeezed between clenched teeth.  
>"Yesss?" Murlough asked sarcastically. "Do you want to say something?" And he leaned further over the railing, as if he wanted to come closer to her so that he could understand her better.<br>But that was just a game.  
>He put his free hand behind the ear and asked, "What? You want me to let go? You do not want to live any longer? Ok. "<br>And he let go.

Gillian's mind stopped.  
>He had actually released her hand.<br>She fell and there was nothing between her and death.

Something hit her hard from the side and grabbed her under the arms.  
>Gillian felt like she was thrown up and to the side.<br>Her stomach leaped in her mouth as she banged with a hard blow to the metal bars on the bridge.  
>Someone was swinging on a long rope under the bridge, who had caught and thrown her with inhuman force back on the bridge.<br>Everything was spinning around Gillian, but she tried to get on her feet.  
>Her body refused to serve and she fell to her knees.<br>She gasped and saw a black shadow swung over the railing with one hand on a steel cable and landed on all fours next to her.  
>Her savior was not a red-orange hair, but a boy with dark hair, whom she had never seen before.<br>The vampaneze Murlough came up to them, and Gillian gasped a "Caution!" to her rescuer, and tried to get on her feet.  
>The sickening feeling grew stronger and Gillian had a strong urge to vomit, but she pressed her still aching arm against her body and concentrated.<br>She looked at the unknown boy beside her, and tried to estimate what an chance he would have in a fight against the vampaneze.  
>Confused, she stared at him.<br>He was no older than sixteen and had irritating violet eyes.  
>And he was clearly a vampire.<br>The boy grinned unabashedly, and Gillian froze the blood in the veins, as Murlough spoke to him in confidence.  
>"Well, you were lucky that Steve hang out right here. Right, Steve? "<br>The boy grinned impudently and Gillians courage sank.  
>The two knew each other.<br>They were in cahoots.  
>Murlough was now so close that Gillian took hastily a few steps more back, until she hit her back against a steel pillar. "I heard you left old Crepsley?"<br>"How ...", she swallowed and had to bite her teeth together. "How do you know?"  
>"Ts... I have my sources."<br>The headlights of a car appeared at the end of the bridge, and Gillian wondered what the two wanted to do to avoid being seen. She hoped for a chance to escape.  
>But they did nothing until the car stopped next to them.<br>Murlough opened the door to the back seat and with a gesture meant Gillian to enter.  
>Gillian shook her head.<br>"As you wish. Then I'll probably just throw you back off the bridge. "  
>Gillian swallowed.<br>She had no choice.  
>She climbed into the car.<p> 


	7. Chapter 7: passive aggressive

Chapter 7: "Passive aggressive"

To her relief the vampaneze sat down in the frontseat and the unknown boy climbed next to her in the back of the car.  
>He put his arm cheeky over the backseat, as if Gillian was his date and the car drove off.<br>Gillian looked out of the window and tried to see where they were going.  
>From time to time she threw curious glances at the boy by her side.<br>Who was that?  
>He was hardly a man, more of a teenager with black hair, that was neatly arranged in an out-of-bed-style, and a pretty decent face, which certainly never needed any shaving yet.<br>And these irritating purple eyes.  
>How Murlough had called him again? Steve?<br>Gillian had heard that name before.  
>Steve noticed that she was watching him, and he smiled at her.<br>Then his gaze went with a grin to her neckline.  
>Gillian didn`t care. Let him stare.<br>She pressed her right arm firmly against the body and breathed against the pain.  
>Her right shoulder was dislocated, and Gillian could not heal that with blood.<br>Murlough looked from time to time in the rearview mirror and licked his lips when his eyes met Gillians.  
>"Where are we going?", Gillian asked.<br>"Home," said Steve, and looked very self-satisfied.  
>"Your name is Steve?"<br>"Steve Leonard. But actually I am called Leopard. "He and Murlough laughed.  
>"You're a friend of Darren Shan", Gillian guessed.<br>"An ex-friend," he spat.  
>"Ex-Friend, why that?"<br>Steve glared at her: "Because he has taken my place!"  
>Gillian swallowed.<br>"But you can sing a song about this, don`t you?", he said and turned his head to the window.

They drove in a run-down area full of empty industrial buildings and finally stopped in front of an old warehouse.  
>Steve and Gillian followed the vampaneze Murlough into the warehouse, which was only lit dimly.<br>They were awaited.  
>In the shadows several bare-chested men, stinking of sweat and blood and with bandaged hands, sat around a boxing ring. The murmur died away, as they entered.<br>Murlough had grabbed Gillian at her uninjured arm and dragged her with him to the front and into the ring.  
>Gillian was blinded by spotlights and could hardly say how many men were in the room.<br>Twenty? Thirty?  
>Murlough released her and pushed her into the ring. He spread his arms and shouted: "We have her! May I introduce? Larten Crepsleys little pet ! "<br>Applause rose.  
>Murlough turned in a circle and bathed in the applause.<br>Then he suddenly grabbed Gillian, and pulled her towards him. "It`s not what she is anymore, right little Gillian? You left your master. " He stroked her hair out off her face and Gillian felt his stinking breath on her skin.  
>" Let ... me … go", she squeezed out.<br>Quick as a flash he grabbed her by her other arm, the one with the bad shoulder, and turned it upon her back.  
>Gillian screamed as the pain exploded like a supernova.<br>She was immediately released again, but still it was too much for Gillian. Lightning danced before her eyes and she felt her legs gave way under her.  
>But before she could strike to the ground of the boxing ring, Murlough grabbed her hair and tore her up again.<br>This new sharp pain made her hiss in the air between her teeth.  
>But it also kept her from fainting.<br>From now completely clear eyes again, she shot toxic glances at Murlough.  
>Subconsciously, she clenched her fists and tensed all the muscles. She ignored the pain in her right shoulder now. She clenched her anger and her hatred together into a hard lump of darkness in her belly.<br>A red haze began to slide in front of her eyes.  
>"That`s enough Murlough. Let her go. "<br>Murlough immediately released her hair, and stepped a few steps back. "As you wish."  
>Steve entered the ring, and Gillian looked stunned when everybody made space for him.<br>The vampaneze listened to that boy?  
>He bowed slightly and offered her his arm. "Come."<br>When she didn`t took his arm, he shrugged and climbed out of the ring.  
>He looked back over his shoulder at her. "Come."<br>Gillian climbed out of the ring and followed him.  
>The red haze slowly vanished.<p>

Steve led her into an adjoining room and shut the door behind them.  
>He pointed to a broken sofa and Gillian grateful took place.<br>"Let me see your arm."  
>She shook her head.<br>"Come on, I don`t bite," Steve said smiling in a totally disarming way.  
>Gillian allowed that he sat down beside her and groped her shoulder.<br>"This is dislocated," he said factually. "It may hurt now," he added, placed one foot against the seat and waited for her approval.  
>Gillian took a deep breath, looked Steve in the fascinating purple eyes and then nodded decisively.<br>He pulled with a heavy and fast move on her arm, and Gillian felt a tremendous pain and how the joint on her right arm slipped back into place.  
>She had intended not to scream, but a whimpering sound escaped her. Steve let go of her arm and her shoulder began to throb uncomfortably. However, she could move her arm again, without being close to fainting.<br>Gillian tried to calm her breathing and focused on the shoulder. She felt into the throbbing pain, and into the rush of blood in her veins.  
>The blood began to concentrate on the shoulder and slowly the pain subsided.<br>She had used her half-vampire blood to heal herself.  
>But now she will become hungry.<br>She opened her eyes again and saw Steve leaning against the edge of a desk with his arms crossed over his chest watching her carefully.  
>"Better?"<br>Gillian nodded.  
>She looked at him curiously as well. "What did you mean earlier when you said, Darren had taken your place?"<br>Steve grimaced. "Can you imagine something, something that you desire so much and you've always wanted, something for which you would do everything, something that alone would give your life a sense? Well, " he continued, without waiting for an answer," I had something like that. I wanted to be a vampire. "  
>Gillian felt her heartbeat quickened and her cheeks blushing.<p>

"That's why you've been with Mr. Crepsley, after the show. You`ve asked him to turn you into a vampire. "  
>Steve nodded. "That´s how it has been. That was my dream. But unfortunately I had to find out, that my best friend had been stolen this dream. He has not fallen accidently out of a window and had broken his neck. That was just what everybody was supposed to believe. He had a become a half-vampire and was up and away, without saying me anything. "<br>Gillian frowned. And what had happened then? Why stood Steve now before her, transformed, and a horde vampaneze listened to him?  
>"But Darren had not intended that." Gillian shook her head gently. "He wanted Madam Octa, but she had bitten you. You would have died, if Mr Crespley would not have given him the antidote. "<br>"Nonsense!", Steve spat out angrily. "Darren was already in cahoots with the vampire!"  
>Gillian tried to remember what Darren had just told her about that night. Why had Larten never told her what had happened?<br>"But I've found other friends, friends who have given me what I wanted," Steve looked proudly down on her.  
>It did not fail in its effect.<br>There was this teenager, barely older than sixteen, and he was a full-fledged vampire ... already since perhaps several weeks.  
>And she? She was still a halfvampire, since fifteen years.<br>It gave Gillian a pinch.  
>Steve pushed himself away from the edge of the table and walked towards the door.<br>He looked once again over his shoulder.  
>"Murlough had recently made you an offer, do you remember?"<br>His purple eyes were on her.  
>"The offer is still valid."<br>And Steve "Leopard" left the room and shut the door behind him.  
>Gillian heard a key turned in the lock.<br>Then she was alone. 


	8. Chapter 8: protect me from what I want

Chapter 8: "Protect Me From What I Want"

I was much later when the door opened again, Gillian guessed that she had spent a whole day in the room.  
>She heard the key in the lock and Steve walked into the room: "Did you sleep well?" He asked with a grin, and Gillian sat up from the broken couch.<p>

"A blanket would have been nice."  
>She felt every muscle in her body.<br>"Tstss, how inattentive of me. I had completely forgotten that half -vampires can feel cold. "  
>He left the room with the door open behind him.<p>

"Come."  
>"Where to?", called Gillian after him.<br>"I'll show you something. Now come on. "  
>What else could she do?<br>Gillian followed Steve. Of the other vampaneze was nothing to see.  
>They left the warehouse and Gillian looked around, she was puzzled that she was apparently alone with Steve.<br>"Give me your hand. We will flitt." Steve reached his hand out to her.  
>Gillian's eyes widened. Why was none of the vampaneze around to guard her? Did they believe that she could not escape from Steve? Or was he right now helping her to escape?<br>Because she did not take his hand, Steve made an annoyed step towards her and grabbed her arm. Then he turned his back to her. "Come. Hop on. We can only flitt together, if I carried you. Otherwise I would have to tell you where we want to go. "  
>"Then tell me where we want to go."<br>Steve grinned at her over his shoulder: "Then it would not be a surprise. Now hop on, I'll take you piggyback. "  
>If you want, thought Gillian and climbed on Steves back. She wrapped her arms around his neck and he took her legs firmly under his arms.<br>She was now very close to his face when he said: "Hold your breath."  
>Gillian took a deep breath, and Steve flitt off, so that everything around her blurred and the world went slow.<br>Gillian had already traveled in this way on the back of Larten Crepsley, but never with anyone else. She could not help but admire that Steve apparently carried her effortless.  
>When he stopped, they had flitt across the whole city.<br>Steve turned his head to her and said: "We're there."  
>Gillian loosened her grip on his neck, and could not ignore to notice that he, unlike Murlough, smelled very good.<br>She looked around the shabby street, and tried to figure out where they were and what they wanted here.  
>Steve turned in one direction, down the road past the bars and discos and sex shops. He did not even care if she followed him, and Gillian realized that she could escape now easily if she wanted. Apparently she was not his prisoner.<br>Curiosity won and she followed the boy.  
>He stopped outside a nightclub and waited until she followed up to him.<br>He looked at her gravely, and suddenly grabbed his neck and pulled his hoodie over his head.  
>He offered it to her. "Here. Put this on. "<br>Gillian glared at him. What was that about? "I'm not cold."  
>"Come on."<br>He pressed the sweater in her hands.  
>Gillian hesitated briefly, but then pulled the hoodie on.<br>It smelled after him, after some Axe deodorant, that Gillian liked and which she had smelled on him before, and something else more.  
>Steve, now only in a T-shirt, suddenly seized with both hands behind her. Gillian was frightened, and recoiled. Steve frowned.<p>

"Keep cool." And again he raised both hands to her. This time she allowed it, he grabbed the hood of the black sweater and pulled it over her head. He tenderly brushed a strand of her black hair from her face, and then put the hood down low.  
>"It is better if nobody recognizes you," he said finally to explain, and entered the club.<br>Gillian's heart was pounding.

His touch had not been unpleasant.  
>She followed him into the dim interior.<p>

The shabby interior of the club left no doubt what happened here in the back rooms. A woman in lingerie danced listlessly around a pole to the stomping music, and the flashing strobe lights could not hide that she was no longer the youngest.  
>Steve went to the bar and nodded to a man with a greasy bald head. "We are expected. Room 7. "<br>Gillian looked down, and pulled the hood low over her forehead.  
>The man gestured grunting with his chin into a corridor that led to the back, without worrying about that Steve was obviously underage.<br>She followed him with pounding heart down the hallway, anxiously wondering why they were here.  
>Steve knocked on a door to a painted skewed number 7, and entered the room without waiting for an invitation.<br>The room was small, and was taken entirely from a shabby bed with faux leopard fur. It smelled of cigarettes, cheap perfume and sweat.  
>A woman's voice welcomed Steve cooing "Come in, my boy", and Steve took a step to the side, allowing Gillian to take a look at the prostitute, which blinked over to Steve out of glassy eyes, blowing bluish smoke in the air from a cigarette.<br>Gillian was thunderstruck.  
>The woman there on the bed was her mother.<br>Horrified, she watched as she got up and made no effort to hold together the already transparent negligee. She stumbled over to Steve, the fingers of her right hand with a cigarette held up and stared at him from top to bottom.  
>The woman had come down. A wreck, with wrinkled, from a few times too often in the solarium tinted skin, much too bright and destroyed make up and dressed with nothing more than a few bright red lingerie, that lace was partly missing.<br>But it was clearly her mother.  
>"You're cute, kid," she said and went with the free hand over Steves cheek. Then she looked staggering over at Gillian in the entrance, who had the hood still pulled low over her face. "And you've brought your little girlfriend? Well, all right with me. "She stumbled to the bed. "But that costs extra."<br>"Mom," a whimpering moan escaped Gillian.  
>The woman looked up and tried to look at her, woozy from the alcohol.<br>Gillian stepped forward and pulled the hood from her head so that her black hair fell like a veil.  
>" Gill... Gillian?" , stammered the woman.<br>Gillian grimaced with disgust.  
>"Gillian, it`s really you." Her mother got up and tried to hug Gillian, but she backed away in horror.<br>The woman lowered powerless her arms, and flopped back on the bed.  
>"Don´t you want to hug your old mom?", she said tearfully.<br>"Hugging you? Look at you! ", Gillian spat out.  
>Her mother cringed as if she had been beaten. With one hand she tried to close her negligee in the front, with the other she took a shaky zip on her cigarette. She could not look in Gillian's eyes. "You must not be angry with me, you have to understand ...", she began, but stopped.<br>"No, Mom, I'll never understand."  
>Her mother looked up now.<br>"You look good," she said tenderly. "Let me take a look at you, child. Such a pretty girl you've grown", and she patted the mattress next to her as an invitation to sit down.  
>But Gillian shook her head.<br>"You don`t want to sit next to me? You're probably too fine", she took a breath again and blew the smoke out with an evil eye. "You didn`t change. You have always been something better, don`t you, Gillian? You 've always been too fine for this life. And for your mother. "  
>Gillian glared angryly back.<br>"What? Why did you come here? Huh?" She ripped off the negligee, so that her shoulders were exposed. "Are you not proud of me?"  
>She laughed nastily.<br>"You disgust me," Gillian said cold.  
>"Shut up!" Her mother screamed. "It`s your fault! If I had not got you, then all this would have never happen! "<br>Gillian's face twisted with anger: "Be quiet!"  
>The mother continued: "You think I did choose this? You think I have not imagined my life differently? Do I look like someone who wanted to have a crying baby, a nasty child that constantly wanted something, food and toys and school books and extra clothing ... "<br>"Be quiet," Gillian hissed.  
>"... and then these allegations when you became older. But I don`t let one little brat tell me, how I have to lead my life. "<br>"Be quiet," hissed Gillian again. A red veil crawled in the edges of her eyes and her ears burned.  
>"Get out of my eyes, you ungrateful brat! You have taken everything away from me! My freedom! I've never wanted you! "<br>"Shut up!" Gillian growled in a low tone. In one step she passed the whole room, and stretched out her arms to her mother, as if she wanted to hug her. Her mother shrieked: "Don`t touch me!", but Gillian had grabbed her head with both hands, and turned it with a rush wrench to the side.  
>It gave a loud crack and her screaming stopped.<br>The body of the mother slumped, her face pressed to Gillian's belly, her hands hanging limply down the sides.  
>The cigarette slipped from her fingers and rolled burning on the ground.<br>For a moment mother and daughter stood there in a grotesque embrace.  
>Then Gillian made a step back, and her mother's body flopped carelessly from bed to the ground.<br>Gillian stared down at her and felt that Steve was beside her.  
>He knelt down and without a word put his middle fingers on the artery of the dead woman.<br>After he had convinced himself that her heart did beat no longer, he straightened up and his violet eyes stared at Gillian. "You're thirsty," he stated. "Do you want to ...?", but before he could finish the sentence, Gillian shook her head.  
>"Whatever you say. But that is a waste," he said, shrugging his shoulders.<br>"Can we go?", Gillian said flatly.  
>"Sure", said Steve and stepped over the lifeless body of the woman.<br>Gillian followed him and closed the door to number 7 behind her without looking back.

Outside on the street they both walked silently side by side.  
>Eventually, Steve took Gillian's hand.<br>She awoke as if from a trance. "Why have you brought me here?", she asked.  
>They stopped.<br>"I thought there was something, that you'd have to clarify. Murlough has done this with me beforehand, too. I also had to pay back to somebody ... "  
>Gillian looked at her hand in his, but she didn`t drew back.<br>She looked up, and into his eyes.  
>Then she murmured: "Thank you."<br>Steve smiled, "Then you feel better now?"  
>"Yes. I feel free. "<br>The two walked hand in hand down the neon-lit streets, past roaring drunk and adolescents.  
>"You know, my mother was so similar to yours. I have a feeling like we have something in common. "<br>"Steve ...?" Gillian hesitated.  
>He stopped again and pulled her into a doorway, so that they weren`t in the way of the crowd. Gillian had propped her fists in her pockets and stood close beside him in a entrance before a scratched door, taped all over with posters.<br>"You said the offer Murlough once made, is still valid."  
>Gillian hardly dared to breathe.<br>"Yes, it is. Does that mean, you want to take it? "Steve asked, trying to see her face, but Gillian hemmed and hawed and avoided his gaze.  
>"What is it? You always wanted to be a vampire, why do you hesitate now? "<br>Steve wrinkled his forehead.  
>Gillian chewed on her lips, and silently prayed that he might understand it.<br>"It's because ... Murlough. I ... I can not stand him. "  
>Tortured she looked up at him.<br>Understanding crept into Steve's face. "Oh, I see. You know, he's fine. He has also made me into a vampire. Sure, it does hurt a little and stuff, but then ... I mean ... if you do not want ... "  
>Now Steve was embarrassed.<br>"So ... if you do not want Murlough to make it, perhaps… I mean, maybe ... I could do it then."  
>Gillian was amazed: "That`s possible?"<br>Steve built up in front of her with pride. "Of course. I'm a full-fledged vampire. "  
>"A vampaneze, you mean"<br>Steve made a dismissive gesture. "They are not as bad as you think. I mean, look at me. And Murlough ... ok, he seems a bit extreme at first. But it`s just that he is not such a wimp like the other vampires. I mean, Larten Crepsley, what is he? A circus clown! "  
>He fell silent, apparently in fear that he had gone too far.<br>But Gillian just looked at him. "Why will you do that for me, Steve?"  
>The teenager smiled arrogantly and raised a hand to Gillian to stroke her cheek.<br>"Well, because you're a pretty bride. And I bet you will be a really pretty vampaneze. "  
>He grinned.<br>"Will you really make me a vampaneze?"  
>"Of course" said Steve, leaned forward and tried to kiss her.<br>But shortly before his lips met hers, she whispered: "_What do you want from me for that_?"  
>Steve paused.<br>He went back from her, leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest.  
>His compelling purple eyes were on her.<br>"Well, there is something that you could do for me."


	9. Chapter 9: Taste in men

Chapter 9: "Taste in Men"

Darren Shan entered his tent that he shared with the Snake Boy, he was deep in thoughts and not taking care of what was happening around him.  
>Because he was so much in his thoughts, he scared to death when he realized he was not alone in the tent. Someone was sitting on his bed.<br>And it was not Evra.  
>"Shit!" Darren said and clutched at his chest. "Gillian! You scared me!"<br>The halfvampiress Gillian sat calmly with her legs crossed on his bed, wrapped in his sleeping bag. She looked at him from under her black bangs.  
>"Mr Crepsley has not said anything about that you're back," Darren tried to calm down his wildly beating heart.<br>"Mr. Crepsley doesn`t know I'm here", Gillian said softly and soundlessly.  
>"Oh, I see." Darren glanced outside. "It is too early. He will not wake up before an hour on." Darren felt he was relieved.<br>"Man, that's great that you're back. Since you're gone, everything goes wrong here. Crepsley has ... "  
>"We don`t have much time," Gillian interrupted him and got up from bed, so that the sleeping bag slipped from her shoulders. She wore a black hooded sweatshirt over her dress, although it was a warm day. "You must come with me."<br>Darren frowned: "Why ...?"  
>Gillian came up to him and looked earnestly into his face. "It's about your parents. I think the vampaneze have kidnapped them. "<br>Darren was shocked. "What?"  
>"We must hurry up."<br>Darren ran to his bed, picked up his leather jacket from the floor and put it on.  
>He saw that Gillian stared into the other part of the tent, to the chest where Darren knew, Evras snake was sleeping in. When she noticed his glance, she looked away quickly.<br>"Are you coming?", she asked.  
>Where exactly is Evra? , Darren wondered, but aloud he said: "Wait, we must awaken Mr. Crepsley."<br>"No, Darren, we have to do this without him." She pulled him by the arm.  
>"But Crepsley is ..."<br>"Larten Crepsley will not lift a finger to save your parents, they are only human," Gillian said harsh, and pulled the struggling Darren out of the tent.  
>"No, I cannot believe that. He is not that way ... ", Darren muttered incredulously.<br>Gillian stopped and looked him straight in the eye. "I've known him longer than you."  
>Darren swallowed.<br>Then he followed the halfvampiress outside.  
>Gillian threw a glance back to the chest.<br>I'm sorry Evra, she thought.  
>Gillian went ahead and pushed Darren behind a trailer because some Cirque performers were passing by very close. "We must flit from the camp ground," she whispered urgently to Darren. "We meet on the hill. Watch out that no one sees you. "<br>Darren nodded approvingly.  
>Then Gillian was gone.<p>

The house of the Shans was quiet and abandoned, there was no light inside but the car was parked in the driveway.  
>A buzz filled the air, as if someone had wiped over the colors with a damp cloth, as the half-vampires Darren and Gillian appeared suddenly in the garden.<br>"Dad's car is there, and the patio door is open, but nobody seems to be home," Darren whispered. "You're right, something is wrong."  
>He crept up to the porch and slipped into the house.<br>Gillian followed silently.  
>Darren searched the house from top to bottom, but nobody was there.<br>When he came back down the stairs from the first floor into the hallway, worried because he had found no one there, he found Gillian with her arms crossed over her chest leaning on a dresser. "They are not here," Darren said breathlessly. "You mean somebody kidnapped them?"  
>Gillian nodded.<br>"But where to?", the vampires assistant applied.  
>Gillian bit her lips. "I don`t know ..."<br>Darren began to rummage through the wardrobe. "Dad's car keys are here, and his jacket and all ..."  
>"Darren? What did Mr. Crepsley say, after I was gone? "<br>Darren hardly noticed, he was searching for clues where his parents could be. "He was totally out of mind. The last three days without you were terrible. He was ònly lying in his coffin and just didn`t want to come out. And he had a dream. He said he had seen you jumping off a bridge ... what is that? "  
>Darren pushed Gillian aside to take a look at the dresser. "Oh my God, look!"<br>Darren pulled a knife that was stuck in the wall. A green paper had been pinned to the wall at eye level. "This is a ticket for the Cirque du Freak". He had not noticed it before, because Gillian had stood in front of it.  
>Gillian looked over his shoulder. "It is an old ticket."<br>Darren's eyes widened. "That's my ticket! Look at the date: six weeks ago. That was the date when Steve and I ... ", Darren hit with the flat hand against his forehead :"The Theatre! They are in the old theater! "  
>And he opened the front door and stormed off.<p>

The old theater was quiet and deserted, as Darren and Gillian entered it. They sneaked through the rows of chairs to the stage, listening to every sound.  
>"I think they are not here," whispered Darren and climbed onto the stage.<br>"That depends on who you're looking for," a voice shouted down from the balcony, and Darren turned in shock. Up there a figure was standing on the balustrade with crossed arms and looked down at him. The figure was hardly seeable in the darkness, but the voice was all too familiar for Darren: "Steve!"  
>Steve grinned. With one leap he jumped down from the railing and landed with outstretched arms next to Darren on the stage as if he had wings.<br>Darren gasped in shock and took a step back.  
>"Steve! But .. what ... how did you ... ?"<br>He saw his best friend, but at the same time not.  
>Steve had changed.<br>To his smug arrogant face, pale skin and irritating purple eyes had come. "You're ...", Darren gasped.  
>Steve grinned. "Surprised? So was I, when I found out that my best friend has become a vampire. How did that happen again? "<br>Steve put a finger to his lips, in mock thoughtfulness. "My best friend was climbing out the window at night, fell and had broken his neck. He was dead and I was at his funeral along with his crying sister and his parents. "  
>"Steve, I ...", Darren moaned.<br>"But no, my best friend was not dead, he had turned into a vampire, and then faked to be dead. So he could disappear together with his vampire master Larten Crepsley, and nobody would ask for him. "  
>Steve's eyes sparkled, and Darren stepped involuntarily back from him.<br>"I was the one who had wanted to be a vampire. But you're the one who made it. You already had planned it, right? You've said to Mr Crepsley, I am evil. You have made sure that he rejects me, that you yourself ... "  
>"No!" Darren gasped. "I never wanted to be a vampire. I have only consented to become his assistant in order to save your life. Otherwise you'd be dead now!"<br>"What a heartbreaking story that you've worked out", he snorted. "I thought you were my best friend!"  
>"I'm your best friend" , Darren said outraged.<br>"You've stolen my place!"  
>"It looks like you've found a place somewhere else ..." Darren wondered how it was possible that his friend Steve was standing here before him as an angry vampire. When was that done, and who had transformed him?<br>Steve built himself ostentatiously up in front of him. "Surprised? I have found friends who gave me what I wanted. Real friends. "  
>An evil smile spread across his face, and Darren felt his heart contracting. "Who ...?"<br>"Oh, it's not one of those ridiculous vampires, such as those with whom you feel friendly. No circus clowns or vain dandys. We don`t narcotize our prey cowardly and take only a small sip of blood so that our powers vanish. Look at me! What are your ridiculous half-vampire powers against me? "  
>"You're a vampaneze!", Darren was shocked.<br>Steve grinned evilly.  
>"You kill your victims!" Darren swallowed. He could not believe it.<br>"And you, Darren? Have you ever drunk human blood?" Steve came menacingly towards Darren.  
>"No, and I won`t. I told you, I never wanted to be a vampire. " Darren stepped back against Gillian, who had all the time stood quietly behind him.<br>He shivered, because she seemed changed. Her face under the black hood revealed nothing of what she thought, and yet ... why had she brought him here?  
>Why did she not say anything?<br>Was she under cahoots with Steve?  
>Then he noticed : "This sweater should have looked familiar to me immediately," Darren said.<br>"You must learn to be aware to your surroundings," Gillian said in an emotionless voice.  
>"Very stupid of you, that you won`t drink human blood," Steve interrupted the two. "Then you've got no chance to defend yourself," and he gave Darren a punch in the stomach.<br>Darren crouched panting and tears sprang to his eyes.  
>Before he could straighten up again, Steve hit him hard with his boot and caught Darren on the head, so that he fell crashing to the ground.<br>Blood shot from his nose.  
>Steve leaned over his former best friend and grabbed him by the collar. He bared his teeth, and pointed canines that came to light.<br>Darren blinked from watery eyes up at him.  
>"That's enough, Steve," Gillian said, quietly, and wanted to hold him back on the arm.<br>But Steve's head snapped in her direction, and his purple eyes glowed when he gave Gillian such a violent blow that she was thrown back several yards.  
>"You keep out of this!" Steve hissed and turned his head back to Darren.<br>Gillians flight was caught by the old tattered curtain, so she landed in a cloud of dust.  
>She picked herself up again immediately, right in time to see Steve snapping at Darren's throat.<br>Darren, however, began to fight back: he turned aside at the last second, so that Steve's teeth met only empty air, but he only gained another a punch in the stomach.  
>"Shit!" Gillian cursed and flit forward to grab Steve at his shirt and pulled him away from Darren with a jerk.<br>Steve landed on his feet and growled at Gillian: "You dare to interfere, halfvampire?"  
>"What is this, Steve? Do you want to kill him ? "<br>Darren stared in horror at Gillian.  
>How came the two did know each other?<br>What had Larten Crepsleys student to do with his best friend, who had become a vampaneze?  
>"What if? Do you want to stop me? ", Steve scoffed.<br>In a split second he shot forward and slapped Gillian, who was thrown in a swirl of hair to the ground.  
>Shocked, she lay on the stage that is the world, and held her aching cheek.<br>She had not expected that Steve would hit her.  
>She had been wrong about him.<br>"Leave her alone", Darren shouted.  
>"Oh, how chivalrous," Steve grinned sarcastically. "Will you defend her now? Have a crush on her, what Darren? "<br>Gillian got to her feet, and build up next to Darren.  
>Steve's smile froze. "What's this Gillian? I think you want to become a vampire? "<br>Gillian nodded. "Correct. A vampire, not a vampaneze. "  
>Steve curled his nose in disgust. "But it's too late. We have other plans."<br>From the darkness behind the stage curtain, a figure emerged, his sharp teeth flashed in the shadows.  
>Murlough.<br>Gillian felt panic crawling up at his sight. What business had he here? Steve had betrayed her!  
>Gillian's eyes met those of Darren.<br>The young half-vampire was not a good fighter.  
>And if it was true that he had never drank human blood, he had little chance against Steve.<br>Gillian would have to fight at the same time Murlough and the young vampaneze.  
>And she knew that she alone had hardly a chance with Murlough alone.<br>And after what she had seen from Steve, the young vampaneze too had already developed some remarkable skills.  
>The probability was very high, that Gillian would die in this battle.<br>Gillian straightened and shifted the weight on her feet.  
>Her heart was beating to her head and she forced herself to calm her breathing. She looked at Murlough, but kept Steve in the corner of her eyes.<br>Darren was sweating with fear beside her.  
>In her belly darkness gathered into a hard lump.<p>

"Is the show already over?", Murlough asked in his slow accent. " Did I come too late?"  
>"Just in time," Steve grinned. "They're ready."<br>"Ah ..." smiled Murlough. "Time to die."


	10. Chapter 10: Black eyed

Chapter 10: "Black Eyed"

In the same moment that Murlough and Steve shot forward to attack Darren and Gillian, Gillian jumped several meters high into the air and pulled the knife from her boot shaft in one fluid movement.  
>In the corner of her eye she noticed how Darren did flit away, and Steve shot into empty space, then the gravity pulled her back down, where Murlough awaited her with bared claws and teeth.<br>She stabbed him with the knife, but caught him only on the surface in his chest. He snapped up, startled, because he had not expected this, but got not distracted long enough by the unexpected pain, so Gillian got a punch, which blew her away.  
>As Gillian hit with force against the stucco wall of the theater, so that dust and dirt trickled down on her, she transformed her anger and her pain into darkness.<br>She had just enough time to see how Darren and Steve hit against each others, as Murlough came back on her.  
>Gillian pretended that she was still dazed, and remained lying with closed eyes on the floor.<br>She hoped that her old trick might work one more time.  
>But Murlough did not fall on it again.<br>At the last second he did flit and Gillian did not have time to dodge him.  
>He grabbed her with his sharp fingernails at the throat and Gillian screamed, before her breath was cut off.<br>Tentacles of smoky darkness had begun to spread from Gillian, but she withdrew it.  
>Too late for darkness.<br>She ignored the fact, that she needed air to breathe and that hot blood was running down her neck and slammed her knife into Murlough chest to the hilt.  
>He grunted, dropped her and stumbled backwards.<br>Gillian cursed.  
>She hadn`t staked him correctly.<br>Soon he would simply pull out the knife, and would be back on her in no time.  
>"I hate you!", Steve screamed somewhere and pinned Darren at the other end of the auditorium against the wall, the half-vampire caught in a stranglehold.<br>Gillian couldn`t do anything for him, she had to get rid of Murlough.  
>She blinked, a red veil had fallen over her eyes.<br>Gillian's body was full of delicious adrenaline that caused her blood to rush through her body and put her crazy butterflies in the stomach. Gillian repressed all anxiety, she gave herself up to the intoxicating feeling of danger and rage and hatred, and clenched this dark force to a strand in her right arm.  
>Where she had carried the knife, she now felt a tool of darkness.<br>Murlough had pulled out the folding knife and hurled it angrily. He held his fingernails as if they were blades and stared snarling at the halfvampiress.  
>Ooooh, yes. This will be fun, he thought.<br>Murlough grinned and pranced forward and backward, flitted now here and there, so that his opponent would have no chance to guess from which side he would attack.  
>Gillian was focused on him, and tried to follow his movements with her eyes.<br>Then she swung her right arm.  
>In her hand appeared a strip of darkness and lashed the air snapping like a snake.<br>She made an elegant semicircle, and caught Murlough at the shoulder, who cried out in pain. He stared at the wound incredulously, which was smoking like it had been burned with sunlight. "What ...?" This was something he had never seen before.  
>What did the halfvampiress do?<br>Could she form a weapon made of shadows?  
>Gillian attacked him again, this time, pointing to his face.<br>Murlough responded fast as lightning and attacked with his right paw, hissing through the air.  
>He caught Gillian across the chest and tore it open, leaving behind deep cuts, from which blood flowed immediately. The sight and smell made him furious.<br>He flitted forward and grabbed her and before she even could start screaming.  
>The dark streaks in her hand disappeared.<br>He clutched her with both arms and held her in a straitjacket.  
>Gillian looked at him with horror in her eyes, and his hot stinking breath grazed her face.<br>"The time has come", he breathed and his pointy teeth flashed as he struck his fangs into Gillian's delicate porcelain-white neck.

The pain was unbearable and Gillian wriggled helplessly in his merciless grip. The vampaneze took deep gulps and sucked with all his strength, and Gillian felt the precious life-blood was sucked out of her. Everything swirled and looked blurred.  
>Suddenly the vampaneze let go from her and spat out in disgust. "You taste horrible!" Angrily, he stared down at her. "What is this?" He stuck out his tongue as if he had tasted something particularly bitter. "It's like ..."<br>"Snake," Gillian whispered and her head jerked and bit the vampaneze Murlough in the neck.  
>Her teeth went through his skin effortlessly and immediately a jet of hot blood shot Gillian in the mouth.<br>She greedily gulped it down.  
>It went tingling through her throat and foamed in her stomach like sherbet.<br>This was not just any blood.  
>It was vampanezeblood.<br>Heat shot through her body and Gillian was about to take another greedy gulp.  
>But was pulled away from the vampaneze.<br>Since she refused to let go of his throat, she tore the muscles and veins in his neck to shreds.  
>It was a gruesome sight, how the vampaneze pulled the halfvampiress with an enormous effort from his throat, while she had sunk her teeth into him, and refused to let go like a bulldog.<br>Blood covered her own chest and dripped from her mouth.  
>Murlough held the little woman at arm's length from him, while his throat was half open.<br>He lifted one knee and let Gillian crash down on his leg, as if she weighs nothing.  
>With a horrible crack her spine broke.<br>Murlough threw the woman away like she was a rag doll.  
>She landed somewhere in the auditorium, her limbs twisted, and didn`t move anymore.<p>

Gillian felt nothing.  
>She was aware that the blood of a vampaneze rushed through her body, but she could not perceive anything of it.<br>It came to her mind, that this should not be that way.  
>From her neck down, she couldn`t feel anything.<br>It was as if she floated in the air, and didn`t have any body.  
>That was not right.<br>Gillian stared astonished at the ceiling, unable to lift her head or to look to the side, or even stir a finger.  
>She heard the sounds of a fight in the room, heard wheezing sounds and hard thuds, but couldn´t see anything, except the cobwebbed chandelier tingling above her.<br>Now I`ll die, she thought and felt only a gentle regret about it.  
>Meanwhile, the sounds of the battle died away in the auditorium.<br>Gillian wondered vaguely, whether Darren was dead.

Then she heard his voice: "Gillian!"  
>Darren's face appeared above her.<br>Concerned, he looked down on her.  
>"What is with her?"<br>He looked over his shoulder at someone in the room behind him, whom Gillian couldn't see.  
>She assumed that someone was there, and had the vague idea that someone touched her body, without really feeling it.<br>Then orange-red hair slid into view.  
>Tears filled Gillians eyes.<br>"Larten ...", she whispered, but her voice was so low that she hardly even heard herself.  
>The vampire, however had heard her, and a relieved smile spread across his face.<br>She felt that he laid a rough hand on her cheek, and stroked her face.  
>He tried to smile encouragingly, but scanned at the same time her body with his eyes, as if he wanted to determine the extent of the damage. "Her spine is broken ...", he whispered.<br>"But you ... you can still save her, right?", Darren begged and sounded like a frightened child.  
>Larten Crepsley looked at Gillian: "I don`t know. She is already half transformed ... "<br>Gillian felt like an icy stab touching her heart. He wouldn`t ... would Larten let her die?  
>"Does that mean ...? Does that mean you cannot cure her?", Darren asked in a strangled voice.<br>"I can. But when the blood reaches her heart, she becomes a vampaneze."  
>The scarred face of the old vampire expressed grief and despair.<br>Gillian looked him into his eyes and whispered: "Forgive me my weak heart…"  
>She tried to smile.<br>A slight tingling began to spread in her fingertips.  
>Larten Crepsley swallowed. Then he slid his arms under Gillian's battered body and lifted her up.<br>"Maybe there is a way," he said.  
>"There is just not much time anymore."<br>And he disappeared with Gillian in the arms, not more than a blurred dark shadow in the old abandoned theater. 


	11. Chapter 11: Haemoglobin

Chapter 11: "Haemoglobin"

Gillian was in Larten Crepsleys arms and was carried away by him with the supernatural speed of a vampire. The world blurred around her, but she had only eyes for the scarred face of the man who carried her.  
>It's like in my dream, Gillian thought dazed.<br>A slight tingle began to spread in her fingers and her toes.  
>Slowly the feeling came back into her body.<br>The vampire stopped to gather his forces. Sweat had formed on his forehead. It was very exhausting to flit with Gillian in the arms, but she could not hold on to his back herself. He looked down at the pale woman who hung powerless in his arms. The sight was frightening, she looked as if she got caught under the wheels of a truck.  
>Her throat was torn open, where the vampaneze had drawn her blood and her face was smeared with blood and dirt. But the gleam in her eyes was undiminished, and her lips seemed weakly to smile at him.<br>Larten Crepsley took a deep breath, tensing every muscle and gained enough power to travel the rest of the way with one single run.  
>Cirque du Freak was not far off.<br>He reached his tent and laid the battered body of his student gently on the carpet.  
>He smoothed her bloodsticky hair from her face and looked earnestly into her eyes. "I know, you endure pain more brave than every boy," he said huskily, "But now I must really hurt you. Hurt you more than you can stand. "<br>Gillian looked up at the familiar face of her vampire master. "I don`t feel my body ..."  
>"I know, your spine is broken. But the vampanezeblood inside you, is already healing you. You'll soon have feeling back in your body. And then, when the blood reaches your heart, it will transform you."<br>Larten stood up and walked with long steps through the tent. He wiped the curtain at the rear end aside, and came back with the cage of Madam Octa in the hand.  
>He put the cage on the floor next to Gillian.<br>Gillian's eyes widened.  
>"And that's what we must prevent." Larten opened the cage and Octa, the giant spider, crawled out and over his arm to his shoulder.<br>"Not Octa", Gillian gasped and began to move restlessly.  
>The vampire pressed her body down to the ground so that she could not move. "Octas poison will stun you. Your heart will come to a standstill, and the vampanezeblood can no longer spread in your body."<br>Octa was sitting on Crepsleys shoulder and stared from its numerous black eyes down on Gillian.  
>Gillian wailed.<br>She was disgusted by the spider, but greater was her fear of her bite.  
>Gillian had never been able to make friends with the spider, and had attended only reluctantly to her. As long as the animal was sitting in his cage, the halfvampiress had been able to stand with their presence, but every time when Crepsley took her out, she froze with fear. Which he did often, unfortunately. Gillian had repeatedly attempted to suppress her fear, but every time she reacted hysterically.<br>Therefore Larten had given up trying to make Gillian a part of his show act. It was just too dangerous if she freaked out and screamed on stage, the spider could become dangerous.  
>Fortunately never anything worse had happened, Octa had never bitten Gillian.<br>But Gillian had seen what the bite of this gruesome spider can cause, she herself had brought goats to the show and disposed them of afterwards.  
>That the spider might crawl on her and bite, belonged to her worst nightmare, and Larten had accepted that and never asked her again to touch the spider.<br>Now Madam Octa began very slowly and with gentle movements to crawl up on Larten Crepsleys arm.  
>Gillian felt she panicked.<br>"Not Octa. Please ... ". The tingly feeling had spread from her fingers and toes to the arms and legs, and Gillian began to wriggle desperately, while her gaze was fixed on the spider, which was coming closer.  
>Larten pressed her harder against the ground. "Hold still, Gillian!" he thundered. "It must be."<br>Gillian stopped frightened.  
>Larten tore the sweater in a half, which Gillian was still wearing, and began to open her dress as well, while the spider was crawling down on his arm.<br>As the vampire unclasped the corsage of the dress, and pushed aside the bloodstained midnight-blue fabric, he tried not to show his concern. Across her chest ran three deep cuts, that Murloughs claw had given her. The wounds had stopped bleeding, but had not yet begun to heal. And how they looked like, they would never be able to heal completely. Gillian would retain three scars, just as he himself has three scars over the face from the claws of a vampire.  
>He bent down and licked tenderly over the jagged wounds.<br>Gillian's body shuddered, even though she did not feel how the lips of the vampire touched her. Gillian saw the vampire bent down his face and touched her bare skin, and under other circumstances she would have been very excited.  
>But now she only thought of the spider, which had disappeared from her field of vision.<br>When the red hair came up again, Octa had disappeared from his shoulder.  
>The idea that the hairy spider was sitting on her naked chest, made her hyperventilate.<br>"Calm down", Larten said to her. He took up the flute.  
>Gillian's chest was pumping because she panicked.<br>"Gillian," growled the vampire. "You have to stay calm, you're pumping the blood too quickly to your heart."  
>When he saw that she was far from calming down, he leaned over and gave her a kiss on the forehead. He whispered: "Trust me."<br>Gillian's eyes were large and round, almost black, like they consisted only of dilated iris.  
>Her gaze fixed on Larten eyes, and she held her breath.<br>Larten nodded, raised his whistle to his lips and began to blow a few sad tones.  
>Madam Octa was sitting quietly on the chest of the halfvampiress and began to crawl on the bare skin forward until she was sitting directly over the heart.<br>At the quavering tone of the flute she lifted her legs, sat up and ... stung.  
>The spider bite just above the heart into the vein and injected its poison.<br>Immediately a shudder went through the body of the halfvampire and then she remained stock still.

The vampire changed the melody on the flute and stretched his hand out so that the spider could crawl on it.  
>Then he sat her back in her cage.<br>Gillian laid there paralyzed, and the gleam in her eyes had extinguished.  
>I hope I am doing the right thing, Larten thought, and pulled out two daggers.<br>He hesitated.  
>What he meant to do was able to kill the halfvampiress.<br>It was dangerous enough to send Octas poison in her body while she was hurt that much.  
>But what he was going to do now, was pure madness.<br>He meant to bleed out Gillian's body completely.  
>Because Octas venom prevented the transformation of Gillian not, it only slowed down the process.<br>And she has to be transformed, or she would die.  
>Her injuries were too severe that she would be able to live on as a halfhuman being.<br>Only vampire blood could heal her broken spine, and only vampire blood could turn her, so she continued to live after that.  
>But not the blood of Murlough.<br>Larten would do everything he can to prevent, that it was Murloughs blood that made Gillian into a vampire.  
>But could he risk, that she might die?<br>Be strong, Gillian, he prayed. Be strong for me, I don`t want to lose you.  
>Then he took the daggers and made several long, well-aimed deep cuts on her wrists, ankles and on her throat.<br>He watched as blood ran from the wounds, and when it was not going fast enough, he bent down and placed his lips on Gillian throat and closed the wound with his mouth, where she had been bitten by Murlough.  
>Then he began to suck out the blood from her.<br>It tasted foul. Like cold, bad blood. And yet something more, a nuance that he could not identify.  
>He spat out the blood and sucked more immediately.<br>Larten Crepsley could not explain why, but he felt as though her blood tasted like snake.  
>The vampire sucked and sucked the blood out from Gillian, who was still lying there and did not flinch at all.<br>But Crepsley knew she felt something.  
>The pain must be unbearable, and she was a prisoner in her own body, unable to move.<br>The thought choked him, and he cursed himself.  
>You egoistic old asshole, he scolded himself, she doesn`t need to suffer this pain.<br>He pushed the thought aside and hurried to finish what he had started.


	12. Chapter 12: My sweet prince

Chapter 12: "My Sweet Prince"

Octas bite did barely hurt, and when the poison spread through her, it felt like she had been doused with cold water.  
>Now Gillian could not move, and the light went out.<br>She heard nothing, and it was almost as if she had fallen asleep, but then she felt a sharp pain in her arms and legs and she wanted to move, but was as set in stone.  
>But that was still bearable compared to the pain that followed.<br>Again she felt her precious blood being sucked out of her, but this time she could do nothing to defend herself against it.  
>All of her senses screamed at her, that she was in great danger, that she would die if she looses more blood. But she was unable to even lift a finger, or open her eyes.<br>She was dizzy and the pain degenerated into a throbbing beat.  
>She felt very light and very cold now.<br>This is dying, thought Gillian.  
>It was not that hard.<p>

In the impenetrable darkness around her, there was nothing to perceive.  
>Gillian had always felt good in darkness and shadows. Even as a young child she had never been afraid of the dark, but on the contrary, always insisted that all the light was turned off, when she wanted to go to bed. And later as a teenager, she had longed for the dawn every day and when it was dark, she had always felt much freer and more confident.<br>And Larten had taken her in the circus, after he had discovered her extraordinary ability to collect shadows around her. For Gillian it was, as if darkness was matter, not merely the absence of light, but an element, like fire or water, and she could gather it around her or send it away.  
>Now, as she lay there in complete darkness, it was as if the shadows were her friends, even when there was nothing what she could see or do: The shadows still obeyed her.<br>They gathered around and covered her, and filled the emptiness inside her, that was created when all her blood was gone.  
>Gillian was filled with darkness, and as her last drop of blood left her, shadows flowed through her veins, darkness through her arteries and night through all her nerves.<br>It was a high feeling.  
>And someone still sucked, was striving to squeeze even the last drop from her. And her friends, the shadows, whispered to her, that they would be absorbed, and thus kill the attacker, if she wishes so.<br>Gillian saw in her minds eye the attacker Murlough, how he hung at her throat, and she bathed in disgust and hatred at the thought that he only touched her. And yes, she wanted Murloughs death.  
>Suck on, just drink my hatred and my blackness, suffocate by my darkness ...<br>For a moment Gillian gave in to this illusion, when suddenly an image flashed into her mind: Lartens red hair hovered over her, and his scarred face looked sad and worried.  
>Larten.<br>Then the understanding flashed through her: Not Murlough was the one hanging at her throat, it was Larten!  
>NO!, Gillian screamed inwardly, and ordered back all the shadows.<br>Reluctantly, the darkness broke away from her, whispered to her that she would die if she did not allow that they killed the attacker.  
>No, don`t, let him, back away.<br>Then you will die.  
>I trust him.<br>You die.  
>Then it should be.<p>

Larten Crepsley sucked strong at the throat of his student, spat out every time a gush of blood on the carpet and went on.  
>The frail woman did not move, because she was paralyzed from Octas poison. He could taste both the poison and the bad blood of the vampaneze Murlough in her veins.<br>He tried hard to clean her body of both of it.  
>Her condition was now critical: Her heart and breathing were standing still, and there was hardly a drop of vampire blood in her, that kept her alive.<br>Larten stopped.  
>It was enough.<br>If he took more, she would die.  
>In fact, she was already dead at this moment, and Larten prayed that what he was doing now, would bring her back.<br>He reached a hand into an inside pocket of his jacket and conjured up a small vial with a green liquid: Octas antidote.  
>With one hand he uncorked the vial with the other he felt for the dagger.<br>He put the antidote to his lips and threw his head back.  
>He drank the liquid in one gulp, while he made a deep cut on his own wrist with the dagger.<br>He had no time to lose.  
>Gillian's heart stood still, and every second could be too late.<br>While he felt the antidote running down his throat, he put his sliced wrist at Gillian's mouth and let blood drop into her.  
>He lifted his other wrist to his own mouth, slit it open with his sharp teeth and put it on the still open wound at Gillian's throat.<br>I should have closed her wounds first, he thought, and quickly tried to lick the cuts on her arms and legs.  
>He did flit in order to get everything done at once, and still had the feeling of being too slow.<br>When her wounds were closed, he pressed his bleeding wrist to her neck and took Gillian, who was as light as a feather, in his arms.  
>Then he pressed the second wrist to her mouth and prayed her to gulp. Drink!<br>But Gillian was not moving.

The curtain of the entrance was pushed aside and offered a gruesome sight to Darren Shan.  
>His master vampire Larten Crepsley was sitting on the floor, the carpet had been soaked in a puddle of blood.<br>In his arms he held the snow-white Gillian, who was limp and her head hang powerless to the side.  
>From a deep cut on his left wrist Mr Crepsley's blood was running into her mouth.<br>But the worst was the face of the vampire: he was pale and had deep shadows under his eyes.  
>Darren had never seen him so desperate and helpless.<br>As the vampire discovered Darren in the entrance, he became restless.  
>He started to rock the lifeless woman in his arm, and whispered pleadingly: "You have to drink. Drink, Gillian. Please!"<br>Darren heart twisted.  
>It was unbearable to see how much Mr. Crepsley was suffering.<p>

But it was obvious that Gillian was dead.

Then Gillian took a deep swig.

Both the half-vampire and his master stared at the throat of the woman who was moving again, and greedily absorbed the liquid, which flowed into her.  
>Excited the vampire pressed his hand firmly on her mouth, as she opened her eyes.<br>Mr Crepsley held Gillian like a baby and beamed at her, while she sucked greedily on his wrist.  
>She made strong swigs and Larten noticed, that he was very hungry himself.<br>His gaze fell on Darren.  
>He nodded his head to the closet. "Darren. Bring me blood."<br>Darren stared at him, startled, and the vampire had to ask him growlingly a second time. Only then Darren did react.  
>He quickly stumbled over to the little cupboard and threw open the doors. This kept blood bags in a small refrigerator, and Darren took out some.<br>He tried to remember what Gillian had taught him what to be done to ensure that the blood did not congeal. He reached for a glass carafe with sweaty fingers and tried to open the lock.  
>Behind him Gillian made terrible smacking and sucking noises and Mr Crepsley moaned.<br>Forget the carafe, Darren scolded himself, took several blood bags under his arm and ran back to Mr Crepsley.  
>He knelt beside the vampire, holding out a pack.<br>He took them quickly from his hand and tore it open with his teeth. He emptied the bag in one gulp and then tossed it carelessly behind him.  
>Gillian looked at him with big dark eyes.<br>Suddenly she gave a growl like a wild beast and jumped. She pushed Mr Crepsley to the ground and drove her teeth into his throat.  
>She bit tight.<br>The vampire put one hand into her neck and grabbed.  
>He hesitated.<br>He gritted his teeth and told Darren: "Darren. Go, get more blood. " And when the halfvampire did not react: "Go!"  
>Darren hastily retreated and ran away.<br>Relieved to know his assistant no longer around, he focused on the woman at his throat. His instincts cried out to him, that he should tear her away from him, because with every sip she took of him, he was more weakened, so that if Gillian should be no longer herself, he would have with every passing second less odds against her.  
>He saw a terrible vision: he remembered again, how the vampaneze Murlough had the small Gillian joined to his throat and tore her from himself, while she had bitten him so hard, that she tore the muscles and tendons open in his throat.<br>Larten did not want to experience the same.  
>Not that he had such qualms about getting hurt, no, he didn`t want Gillian's new life to begin as it had stopped.<br>"Do you want to you kill me, Gillian?", he growled.  
>Her bite on his throat hurt, and he felt his blood leaving him.<br>She had her arms and legs wrapped around him and held him clasped, as if he was the saving buoy in a harsh sea.  
>"Gillian ...", he whispered, his voice was fading. "You have to stop."<br>Larten groaned.  
>Gillian let go from him.<br>She looked with great dark eyes at him and licked her lips.  
>She wanted more.<br>But something told her that it was enough.  
>Something ... that has been Larten.<br>Slowly she realized how weak he had sounded. And looked.  
>He lay on the floor, and she lay on him, her legs wrapped around him. She now leaned her arms on the floor so that her long black hair fell like a curtain on either side of his face.<br>On his throat was a large bite wound.  
>Did I do that?<br>She licked her lips and again took advantage of this unique flavor.  
>I drank his blood!<br>Larten beneath her groaned and moved.  
>His blood roared in her ears and spread hot from her throat into her stomach.<br>He smelled so good!  
>She felt her whole body was getting warm first, then hot.<br>Larten, he gave me his blood.  
>He has transformed me!<br>The vampire looked at her and put his arms around her waist.  
>And while his blood exuded in her, his feelings spread in her as well.<br>Gillian drew a sharp breath, and noticed now that it was her first breath.  
>Her lungs filled with air and a tingling sensation like a thousand crawling tarantulas spread through her body, and crept through her veins to the tiniest tip of her finger and underneath her scalp.<br>Smiling Gillian leaned down, and tenderly embraced the wound in Larten Crepsleys neck with her soft lips.  
>A hand from Larten moved to her neck and held it firmly, ready to pull her away.<br>"Gillian ...", groaned the Vampire, and Gillian felt a delicious tingling in her, when he said her name.  
>She carefully licked the wound, and at the end breathed a kiss on the once more smooth skin of him.<br>She shoved herself on the man's chest, so that her face was only inches away from him. A wave of heat flooded through her again when she read in his mind, that he was not sure, if she would attack again. She almost laughed out loud with joy, to be able to read his mind so directly and genuinely.  
>Finally.<br>Finally she felt, no, she knew what he felt, what he thought, he was inside her, there was nothing that he could hide from her now.  
>Gillian pursed her lips and a shiver shot through her body, as she delved into herself, into a very specific thought into a very specific feeling: into the emotions that Larten had for her.<br>And yes, they were there.  
>And they were strong.<br>The student lay on the vampire Larten Crepsley, her eyes closed with pleasure, wrapped one leg around him.  
>The vampire also held her closely, and ran a rough hand gently down her back.<br>Gillian opened her eyes and looked the man with the scar in the eyes.  
>Then she leaned a few inches forward, her lips almost touched his.<br>She inhaled his scent, and the vampire opened his mouth slightly.  
>Gillian pressed her lips to his and kissed him passionately. Larten Crepsley answered the kiss slowly.<br>In her body sherbet powder tickled.  
>They kissed long and deeply, and when they departed, both were out of breath.<br>Gillian was smiling at her vampire master, and then lounged comfortably in his arms.  
>Larten swallowed.<br>"I'm sorry to interrupt this beautiful moment," he said huskily. "But please, prepare yourself for the fact, that it will hurt again. When my blood reaches your heart. "  
>"Hmm", Gillian muttered. She could not imagine anything, that could destroy this indescribable feeling that she had now.<br>Nothing could be better than to feel this close to Larten Crepsley.  
>She had never felt so strong, beautiful, invincible and immortally great.<p>

She still lounged comfortably in Lartens arms, when a pain closed around her heart like a claw.  
>With one stroke all the beauty was gone.<br>Gillian screamed.


	13. Chapter 13: Ask for answers

Chapter 13: "Ask for answers'

A crowd had gathered in front of the tent of the vampire. They were all members of the Cirque du Freak and they all had heard Gillian, Larten Crepsleys assistant, screaming in pain.  
>It had been terrible screams.<br>It had made them call for Mr Tall, the Director, and Mr. Tall had come and entered the tent of the vampire, what no one else had dared to do.  
>He had not come out again by now.<br>But the cries had died.  
>Then, finally, the long figure of Mr Tall appeared in the entrance. He had to bent down to get out and then came up to his imposing size again.<br>Immediately the murmur of the audience became louder, and they called out questions to him.  
>But Mr Tall calmed them down with his big hands and assured them everything was fine.<br>Under the protection of his big figure, Gillian slipped out of the tent behind his back and scurried into the trailer with the showers.  
>She badly needed a bath.<br>The way she looked, she could not come under the eyes of any member of the circus.  
>It took Gillian half an eternity to wash the blood out of her hair.<br>When she stepped out of the shower with a swirl of hot air, refreshed and clean, she felt like a new born person.  
>And she was, in a way.<br>She picked her old dress up from the floor, but noticed that it was completely torn and soaked with blood.  
>Without regret, she stuffed it with the equally tattered sweater of Steve in a garbage can, and took the flowered bathrobe of Kristina Teeth, which hang on a hook, and slipped it over without asking for permission.<br>Unnoticed by anyone Gillian left the camp and climbed up the near hills.  
>It was a warm summer night and the stars shone down on her.<br>Gillian the vampire sat down on a rock and looked down at the campfire and colorful lanterns of the Cirque du Freak. From a distance, she heard someone playing violin, cicadas hummed their songs around her, and the wind whispered through the trees.  
>For the newborn vampiress everything appeared more lively and colorful. It was as if she saw the night for the first time, as if a gray veil, which had been over the world and her heart, had been lifted.<br>Gillian enjoyed her hair fluttering in the wind, and dug her bare toes into the ground.  
>A man appeared on the hill, stepped behind the vampiress and looked with her down at the cirque.<br>"It's like the night sings a song, isn`t it?"  
>Gillian nodded without looking at the man.<br>"Ah ...", he breathed a rattling breath, "I remember how I felt on my first night. Indescribable. Like I would be young forever."  
>Gillian smiled. "But Gavner Purl, you still are."<br>Gillian turned to the old vampire beau, who took her hand and brushed a kiss on it. "Very charming of you, my dear. You give an old vampire the feeling to be attractive again." He was panting asthmatically.  
>Gillian stood up from the rocks and took the package that Gavner Purl held out to her: "This is for you."<br>She opened the package and one of the dresses, which the Gavner had bought for her, came to sight.  
>"Mr Telton assured me, that you have looked marvelous in this."<br>Gillian was beaming. This dress had been her favorite one.  
>"Put it on."<br>Gillian pursed her lips and smiled mischievously. She turned around and let her bathrobe slip to the ground. Since she was wearing nothing underneath, she stood for a moment naked in front of Gavner Purl, before she pulled the dress over her head.  
>She heard the vampire breath heavy behind her.<br>Gillian grinned. She had owed this to him.  
>Gavner Purl closed the zipper on her back, and smiled.<br>She turned to face him.  
>"Ah, Mr. Telton was right."<br>"Thanks," said Gillian, looking girlish in mock embarrassment to the ground.  
>Gavner Purl cleared his throat. "I hope you understand that I have instructed Mr. Telton to return the other dresses. You have overstretched my resources and we do not want that I'm left stranded during the next months, don`t we?"<br>"But ... I thought ... the credit card. The House…" Gillian was confused.  
>Gavner Purl ran his forefinger over his upper lip and mustache and looked peeved. "That wasn`t my house and the credit card ... well, that was, shall we say, borrowed."<br>Gillian stood open-mouthed.  
>Gavner Purl grinned. "Have I impressed you?"<br>"Of course. Then it was all just acting?"  
>Gavner Purl looked indignantly: "But no, my love. Where are you thinking. It was, shall we say ... a courtesy. "<br>Gillian wrinkled her nose."You tried to buy me. You wanted to know, if I still would go back to Larten, giving up on all the clothes and the gifts."  
>Gavner Purl smiled: "Of course. It was a small test of character. And you passed it with bravura. On the first day you fled."<br>"Then Larten knew about it?"  
>"Of course! I would never dare to steal the assistant of a vampire. And least of all, the lovely assistant of my best friend. After you pleaded me to accept you as my student, I went straight to Larten and told him of your planning. We then agreed, that I'll take you with me until you see your fault. The shopping had been my idea, however. I thought it would be helpful to break your will."<br>Gillian swallowed.  
>"Don`t be angry with me, my love. It would have not been rightful, if I had transformed you..."<br>"I know. You have done well."  
>She took a step toward him, put a hand to his cheek and gave him a kiss on the other. "Thank you, Gavner Purl."<br>The vampire looked satisfied.  
>"Tell me only one thing, vampiress Gillian: Was it so terrible with me, that you had to flee on the first day?"<br>Gillian laughed. "It was quite wonderful. It was just ... I have realized the wrongness of my doing so quickly. "  
>Gavner Purl rocked on his heels and pursed his lips, as if he was waiting for another kiss. "I also wouldn`t have been a bad master, right?"<br>Gillian smiled at him seductively. "No, you would have been quite wonderful."  
>Gavner Purl dabbed with a handkerchief some sweat from his mouth, cleared his throat, and reached behind him: "Before I forget ..."<br>He conjured up a bag: "You have left that."  
>Gillian looked in the bag. "What ...?"<br>But when she looked up, the old vampire beau was gone.  
>Gillian reached into the bag and took out what was in it: It was the boots that Larten had presented her.<br>"Oh ...", her heart began to pound.  
>She sat back down on the rocks and pulled the boots over her bare feet.<br>They fitted like a glove.

As Gillian went down into the camp of the Cirque du Freak, all eyes were on her.  
>Someone who just juggled, dropped all the clubs as she passed, and many performers of the Cirque stared after her with open mouth.<br>Gillian smiled sheepishly at them. It had quickly spread that she had been transformed tonight. She did not want that the circus people were afraid of her, and tried to appear as innocent and nice as possible, but her sudden friendliness, as she greeted everyone she met, confused the people, so Gillian quickly pretended to not realize, how they stared after her.  
>She stopped before Evras tent and hesitated.<br>A gentle guitar playing came from inside the tent to her.  
>She raised her hand and knocked.<br>"Yes?", the sad melody ceased.  
>"It`s me, Evra. Can I come in? "Gillian pushed the entrance plane aside.<br>Evra was sitting on a stool with his guitar on his knees and looked at her intently. "You must now ask for permission before you can enter a house?"  
>Gillian laughed. "No, I just wanted to be polite."<br>Evra looked at her from top to bottom. "But is it true what they say? Are you ...?"  
>Gillian nodded.<br>Evras eyes were stuck to her body, which was presented very well in the evening dress. He swallowed and looked away quickly.  
>"I heard you screaming ... Was it very bad?"<br>Gillian shuddered and nodded again.  
>"Evra ... I'm here because I want to apologize ..."<br>"What for? For that you have stunned me and locked in the chest? ".  
>"For that I have stunned you, drank your blood and locked you in the chest", Gillian whispered huskily.<br>Evra jerked up from the stool, and took a few meters safety distance between himself and the vampire. "You ... you ... drank my blood?" He put his hand on his green throat.  
>Gillian looked at him pleadingly. "Yes, but please let me explain ..."<br>Evra shook his head angrily. He kept the guitar in front of him, as if to protect himself.  
>"Evra ...", Gillian stepped towards him and sadly registered that he backed away. "I was thirsty and in urgent need of blood, and I did not have much time, I had to drink before the sun went down ..."<br>"That was not ok!"  
>Gillian folded her hands before her face, as if she would pray. "I know. But ... you've saved my life."<br>The snake boy looked at her in amazement. "I`ve saved your life?"  
>Gillian nodded: "Yes. I was attacked yesterday ... tonight." It seemed like an eternity, but it was just a few hours ago. "A vampaneze has bitten me in the throat and wanted to kill me. But he let go of me, because my blood was too bitter. So I was able to escape." Gillian preferred to keep the details for herself.<br>"Too bitter?"  
>Gillian grinned: "You taste awful. Your blood is like an animal. Like snake blood." She didn`t tell him, that real snake blood was poisonous for vampires.<br>"Oh great ...", Evra dropped his guitar and sat on the edge of his bed. "I taste awful."  
>"I promise I'll never do it again."<br>"Well, yeah. Because you would have to be very, very hungry for to eat something nasty like that again. "  
>"No, Evra", Gillian went to the bed and sat down beside him. "I really will never do that again. That was wrong. "<br>He looked at his hands. "Yes, it was. You could have asked."  
>Gillian was stunned. "Do you mean ...?"<br>Evra looked at her. "If you had asked, I would have given you my blood. You shouldn't have stunned me and put me in the chest. It took hours before someone found me. "  
>Gillian's eyes were moist. "Are you serious?"<br>"Yes, it took eternity until someone came and opened the chest ..."  
>"No, are you serious that you would have offered me your blood?"<br>Evra nodded.  
>Gillian felt her heart warming. She swallowed, and had to look away.<br>"What?"  
>"Thank you." Gillian was close to tears, but she did not want to scare Evra, because her tears would be blood-red now, so she suppressed her feelings and then looked him in the eye. "You ... you're a true friend, Evra."<br>He was embarrassed.  
>"Actually, you're my best friend", Gillian said, noting that she never had someone of whom she could say this.<br>"I would very much like to be your best friend", Evra said shyly. He raised his right fist and spread the little finger "So? Friends? "  
>Gillian smiled. She also raised her hand. "Friends."<br>"And no more secretly biting, without asking permission?"  
>"Never again!"<br>They hooked their little fingers and smiled at each other.  
>Evra pulled back his hand and smiled sheepishly. "It is perhaps fine to have a vampiress as a friend. Especially if she doesn`t like my blood."<br>Gillian grinned. "And of the half-vampire, with whom you are sharing the tent, you don`t need to have any fear, too."  
>Evra grinned back.<br>Gillian stood up. "Speaking of half-vampires. I go and search for Darren. There's something for which I must apologize at him, too. "  
>When Gillian left the tent, the soft melody on the guitar rose again.<br>The song sounded a lot happier now.

She found Darren behind the tent.  
>"Have you been listening?"<br>"Did not you notice me? I thought, as a vampire, you would get that. You have to be more attentive to your surroundings." Darren muttered, putting his fists in his pockets.  
>"Darren ... can we walk a bit?"<br>Darren nodded reluctantly and walked beside the vampire.  
>In silence, they left the camp and went up the hill.<br>The trees rustled and whispered and a light breeze rippled the grass.  
>Gillian tried to find the right words. "Darren. Tonight, what happened was my fault."<br>"You've lured me into a trap!"  
>"Yeah ...", Gillian nodded tortured. "But Steve has tricked me. He has lied to me. I did not know that Murlough would be there. He has deceived me."<br>"From where do you know Steve?"  
>Gillian sighed. The thought of the moment on the bridge when she was hanging on Murloughs arm and he had let her fall, caused her a shiver down her spine. For a moment she thought really, she would die.<br>"They've ambushed me."  
>Gillian realized only now, when she recapped the events of the past three days, what had happened.<br>"They have been waiting for me at the bridge where I have met Larten Crepsley for the first time. They knew, that sooner or later I would go there."  
>And so they knew more about me than I myself, Gillian realized astonished.<br>She had not planned to go to the bridge.  
>Not consciously.<br>But when she thought about it now, it was right.  
>Sooner or later, she would had gone there.<br>It has been destiny.  
>The vampaneze were well informed about her.<br>"Murlough has pushed me off the bridge, and your friend Steve has saved me."  
>"Only that he probably is no longer my friend."<br>Gillian looked at Darren. They stopped.  
>"Did you really want to be a vampaneze?"<br>Gillian frowned. "Darren ... you have to understand that ... Larten has denied it to me, I did not know what to do ... I saw no other way out."  
>Darren wrinkled his nose in disgust. "And you sold me for this."<br>"No", Gillian exclaimed appalled "It was not like that!"  
>"Oh no? You lured me into the theater, with the lie, that my parents were kidnapped. But in reality they were only at the neighbors ... "<br>"Yes. That was a lie, I just wanted to draw you from the Cirque and to a neutral ground. Steve wanted to talk to you."  
>"Talk. Pfff! "<br>"I didn`t know", Gillian pleaded. "I told you, he has tricked me!"  
>"What did he say?"<br>Gillian tried to remember. "He was very hurt. He said, that you had taken his place and he wanted to clarify that once and for all. He said, he could not go on without knowing whether or not you have deceived him. "  
>Darren swallowed. "But I have not betrayed him."<br>"I was not sure. I only knew the version that you told me and what Steve said. So I wanted ... I wanted to know what was the truth."  
>"And after you had known everything, you wanted to kill me!"<br>"No, Darren! I did not know, that Steve was up to something, I did not want you to fight! I told you, I had no idea that Murlough was there! I ... I never thought that Steve can be so full of hate."  
>Darren shook his head sadly. "Me neither."<br>Gillian saw in her minds eye Steve's face and his amazing purple eyes.  
>How could she had been so wrong in him?<br>Darren was plagued by similar thoughts.  
>"What happened with Murlough?" Gillian had noticed nothing of the fight after the vampaneze broke her spine and had hurled her between the old theater seats.<br>"Crepsley killed him."  
>Gillian opened her mouth in shock. "He has ...?"<br>Darren nodded.  
>Gillian's heart began to throb, and fear crept into her. Larten Crepsley had killed the vampaneze Murlough? That was no good ...<br>"What was that, what you did with him? I've seen, how you have burned the Vampaneze with ... a kind of shadowy whip. Mr Crepsley said, he had never seen anything like that before. And me too. "  
>Gillian shrugged her shoulders.<br>Yes, what exactly had she actually done?  
>She remembered to have concentrated shadows inside her and then formed them into a kind of weapon.<br>"I don`t know exactly how I did it. I think it was, because I had so much adrenaline in my blood."  
>She would have to think about this furthermore later on.<br>But first, another question was burning in her soul: "... and what happened to Steve?" Gillian swallowed.  
>She was not sure if she wanted to hear the answer.<br>"He escaped. Mr. Tiny has taken him."  
>"Mr Tiny? He was there? "<br>Darren nodded.  
>Gillian went cold. What had Mr. Tiny been doing there? How much had he seen, and how much did he had his finger in the pie?<br>"Darren ...".  
>She grabbed his arm.<br>"I want you to know something. Whatever happens, I'm on the side of Mr Crepsley. I'm on your side. "  
>"Hmmm, yes, all right."<br>The situation was unpleasant to him, and he eluded her grasp.  
>Gillian looked at him. "To be honest ... I'm glad that Steve is still alive."<br>Darren looked at her, because he felt the same.  
>"But when I meet him the next time ... Then I'll give him a slap, that his head flies off !"<br>Darren twisted his face into a grimace.  
>He saw again in his minds eye, how his friend Steve had hit Gillian so hard, that she had banged on the stage floor.<br>He grinned: "Me too."  
>Gillian grinned back.<br>She took a deep breath and looked up at the stars.  
>"I'm going to leave soon."<br>Darren was shocked: "But you've just come back!"  
>Gillian smiled up at the stars. "Don`t worry, I'm not to leave today. And not even in the next few days. But maybe in a few weeks. I must learn to get along alone. "<br>As she spoke it out, she realized, that it was true.  
>"But before that, there are so many things that I must teach you."<br>She smiled, and Darren understood that his training, now that she was a vampire, would not be easier at all. Nevertheless, Darren was pleased that Gillian still stayed with them for a while.  
>He dreaded the thought of being all alone with Larten Crepsley.<br>"I'm going to Larten now", she announced. "And you ... you better stay away from our tent for the rest of the night."  
>The vampire's lips curled into a mischievous smile and she was gone.<p>

6


	14. Chapter 14: The bitter end

Chapter 14: "The bitter end"

Larten Crepsley stood in front of the mirror and buttoned down his fresh new shirt. He had to change clothes, because his suit had been soaked with blood.  
>Gillian's blood.<br>He pulled on a jacket and sighed. He was worried what the future would bring. This night had changed everything.  
>The vampire looked up, because someone entered the tent.<br>Gillian's sight took his breath away.  
>She wore an elegant low-cut evening dress that he had never before seen on her. Her skin was of a pristine white and her black hair flowed around her like water.<br>As his gaze slid down her body, it remained attached to the boots she wore.  
>His heart pounded as he realized, that it was the one he presented to her and she had not even tried on.<br>It made him happy to see, that she was wearing them now.  
>And that they seemed to fit her.<br>Gillian had stopped and looked back at the old vampire.  
>At his sight her heart throbbed pleasantly, like always.<br>She blushed slightly as she noticed how he looked at her.  
>She quickly walked across the carpet towards him.<br>An acrid smell rose from the carpet into her nose. It was matted with dried blood.  
>Larten Crepsley saw how she crinkled her nose and said: "I fear that the carpet will never be the same."<br>Gillian smiled: "His time was up."  
>Without a word she grabbed a scarf and wrapped it around Lartens neck and helped him to close the last button of his shirt.<br>His fingers touched hers and a pleasant tingling sensation spread through her.  
>She stepped back and looked at her work.<br>The vampire with the orange- red hair and the scar across his face had not changed. Only the amused twinkle in his eyes seemed more intense than usual.  
>It made him more attractive than ever before.<br>Larten raised an eyebrow and scanned Gillian from top to bottom.  
>He ended with an appreciative whistle through his teeth. "You look stunning, vampiress Gillian."<br>Gillian's heart beat. "Thank you."  
>He raised a hand and stroked her cheek. Gillian closed the eyes with a sigh, enjoying the feel of his rough hand on her face.<br>When she opened her eyes again, he stood very close to her.  
>She clung to his hand, like a cat.<p>

It needed not much more, and she would start to purr.  
>"I did not want it to happen this way." Lartens voice sounded husky.<br>"You're not to blame", Gillian whispered.  
>"I am. I should have realized how important it is to you. I should have foreseen, how far you would go. "<br>Gillian felt a lump in her throat. "I would not ... I was just so hurt ... I never would have ..."  
>Larten looked at her attentively.<br>His hand reached under her chin and forced her to look him in the eye. "Yes, Gillian, you would have", growled the vampire.  
>Tears flooded her eyes.<br>"I ...", she stammered. "I wanted ... I just wanted that ... that you love me." Her voice broke.  
>Larten had a firm grip, the pressure of his hand hurt her.<br>"Do you know why I did not want to make you a vampire?"  
>Gillian's heart beat.<br>_Please understand, I can`t _ ... he had said to her, when she had gone with Gavner Purl.  
>What had he meant?<br>Her breath came quickly as she tried to fathom what the vampire had meant.  
>His blood flowed in her veins, and she was so closely connected to him as never before.<br>She had read in his mind like an open book.  
>This connection already began to faint.<br>Gillian noticed with desperate, that again the distance between her and Larten Crepsley grew with every minute.  
>She rummaged in her memory.<br>What had Larten felt for her?  
>What was it, that she was able to read in his mind, before the pain had wiped out all clear thinking?<br>"You do not trust me." She said in the end and swallowed.  
>It did hurt to say it out loud.<br>Larten did let her go.  
>She could still feel where the pressure to her chin where his fingers had been. He had grabbed her hard.<br>She stifled the impulse to rub the spot on her skin.  
>"But now ... now you trust me?", she asked alarmed.<br>Larten turned his back on her and walked to his chair.  
>"Larten!", Gillian called.<br>She tried to read in him, why he did not trust her.  
>"Why? I've never given you reason ... You ...you think… do you think … I have something evil inside of me?"<br>Larten Crepsley looked over his shoulder.  
>"Because of my ability to hide myself in darkness?"<br>The vampire paused and reached for the carafe. He poured some blood into a glass and looked at the red liquid.  
>"This is an unusual skill, Gillian."<br>Gillian thought back to the day on which she had conjured up the darkness for the very first time. It had also been the day, Larten Crepsley had invited her to join the circus ...

She had met the vampire the very first time on the bridge.  
>Larten Crepsley had seen the young woman on the railing, handed her over a ticket for the Cirque du Freak, and was gone.<br>The next evening at the show he saw her in the auditorium, and he had been pleased that she had come.  
>So, the woman had not jumped from the bridge.<br>No, Gillian had not jumped.  
>She had never planned to do it anyway.<br>She had just wanted to feel the delicious tingling sensation in her stomach and the adrenaline in her blood. When the strange man with the scar and the orange-red hair had handed her the ticket she had been stunned.  
>And had gone to the show.<br>As Larten Crepsley then entered the stage, her heart skipped a beat.  
>This was the man who had appeared so mysteriously and vanished out of a sudden!<br>He wanted her to come to this show, and now she was here.  
>He opened his performance with the words: "Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. I am so excited to be here in an anonymous small town that once had character but is now just a bland suburb filled with chain stores and surrounded by slum."<br>An awkward silence fell in the audience.  
>Larten Crepsley continued: "It really is a pleasure to be here, and I feel SO honored that bla blah bla and so on and so forth and excetera adnosium."<br>Meanwhile, he lifted his top hat and a huge, blue-red spider crawled out from underneath.  
>Gillian had watched fascinated his dressage with Madam Octa.<br>Who was this man?  
>The trained spider was amazing, and even if a shiver ran down her spine at the sight of the hideous spider, she felt more and more attracted by the man who played on the flute.<br>Larten Crepsley had also looked at Gillian interestingly.  
>During the whole performance he felt, how she stared at him.<br>After the show, Gillian had been hanging around near the stage door, hoping to meet Mr Crepsley.  
>But he had not appeared.<br>Confused and sad, she returned to her small cold apartment, and tried to understand why her heart was pounding so excitedly at the thought of this man.  
>He was fascinating!<br>So she went in the following night again to the show of the Cirque du Freak, and sat down in the back of the auditorium.  
>Larten Crepsley still discovered the young woman, as he peered through the curtain.<br>So she had returned?  
>That was not good. He had not planned that.<br>Apparently he now had a small fan.  
>The vampire sighed.<br>He decided to go out of the way of the young woman until her interest in him had gone. Tomorrow this would be the last performance of the Cirque du Freak in this city. Then they will move on, and the young suicide girl might soon forget him.  
>He finished his performance, without giving a single glance at Gillian, and disappeared quickly after the show, when he saw, that the woman waited at the stage door keeping a lookout for him.<br>Gillian had been desperate.  
>She wanted so bad to talk to this unusual man.<br>He had given her the ticket, he had recognized her in the first performance, she had felt that he had looked at her!  
>Why did he went out of her way? It must have had a meaning, that he had lured her here!<br>Gillian bought a ticket for the show the following evening. She knew it would be the last performance of the Cirque du Freak.  
>She would talk to Mr Crepsley this time by all means.<br>The following night, Larten Crepsley entered the stage by flitting in from behind the curtain. Like every time a murmur went through the crowd.  
>He noticed the young suicide girl. She sat in the front row this time, and stared at him with burning eyes.<br>Mr Creplsey began with his number.  
>All the while he felt her attention on him.<br>Although it was flattering the old vampire that a young girl had apparently fallen in love with him.  
>And this girl had, admittedly, something fascinating in herself.<br>She was not only young and pretty.  
>He had seen her fight.<br>And he had seen her desperate, standing on the railing of a bridge, ready to jump down.  
>And because he began to feel attracted to this young woman himself, he wanted to avoid contact with her at any means.<br>That was the last thing that Larten Crepsley needed.  
>To fall in love again.<br>He stole a glance at the young suicide.  
>He almost laughed.<br>It was delicious to watch as her face reflected her feelings: she was both fascinated by the vampire and repelled of the spider.  
>Then Larten Crepsley had a sudden idea.<br>He sat Madam Octa on his shoulder and announced that he would ask for the next number one helper from the audience onto the stage.  
>In the hall all breathing had stopped. No one wanted to volunteer to the stage.<br>Larten grinned broadly, made a few dancing steps forward, and addressed the young woman. He bowed slightly, and then stretched out his hand to her.  
>Gillian had stared at him in horror-eye.<br>Her eyes darted back and forth between Lartens face and the spider on his shoulder.  
>Larten had a ripping good moment.<br>Then Gillian had taken his hand.  
>He had nodded appreciatively, and led her onto the stage.<br>After he had told the audience how dangerous it was, what he planned to do now, and inculcated the young woman on stage, not to scream or move quickly, he put the flute to his lips.  
>The young suicide had been paralyzed with fear.<br>Her fear and loathing of the spider were clearly greater than her interest in him.  
>Larten inwardly congratulated himself.<br>According to his idea the young woman would only remember the fear and disgust and she would forget her infatuation with the silly circus clown soon.  
>Pleased with himself Larten played a tune and let Octa slowly move from his arm to Gillian's shoulder.<br>From the corner of his eye he got, that director Tall cast him warning glances from behind the curtain, and he flatly meant to stop this unplanned number.  
>They never took someone from the audience.<br>Madam Octa was just too dangerous.  
>But Larten Crepsley meant that he had everything under control and let the spider crawl up at the neck of the young woman.<br>The suicide was frozen with fear.  
>She had been holding her breath, eyes and lips pressed together and just prayed that it would end quickly.<br>When she felt the ticklish touch of the hairy legs around her neck panic were creeping up inside her.  
>Gillian wanted so much to hold out, wanted to show no fear in front of Mr Crepsley, wanted to impress him, not to disappoint him ... She were aware that she stood in the glare of the spotlights and all eyes were on her.<br>_I'm not here, nobody sees me_.  
>She started to pray an old mantra from her childhood. <em>I'm not here, nobody sees me<em>. _I'm not here, nobody sees me. I'm not here, nobody sees me.  
><em>Gillian became calm, it was as if she would come loose from the world as if a veil fell between her and her surroundings.  
>Even the disgusting spider that now crept up her head, was far away.<br>It was not her affair. _I'm not here, nobody sees me._  
>Larten Crepsley had watched with amusement as the woman endured with closed eyes and bated breath the procedure.<br>He had to admit that the suicide had courage.  
>And self-discipline.<br>Then the light changed in the hall.  
>The vampire was as if the lights had been dimmed.<br>He glanced up, without taking his lips from the flute. But the spotlights still appeared bright and unchanged.  
>Now a murmur went through the hall.<br>He looked quickly back to the woman.  
>And could not believe his eyes.<br>It was as if her black dress became liquefy or turned into smoke.  
>Because where the woman was standing it became darker and darker, and her figure melted into the black backdrop.<br>But this was not a special effect from the show.  
>He looked at Mr. Tall, who gave excited signals.<br>Something was going on.  
>Mr Crepsley hastily changed the melody on the flute and plucked Madam Octa from the woman's head.<br>It was as if he tugged his hand into ink.  
>He stuffed the spider in his coat pocket and exclaimed: "A big applause for my brave assistant, please", and made bows in all directions.<br>Applause came up only hesitantly.  
>Mr Crepsley did not wait, but seized the arm of the suicide and pulled her through a curtain onto the side stage.<br>Instantly it became bright again, and Mr. Tall rushed on stage to announce the next number.  
>On the side stage it was dark, and even Mr. Crepsleys vampire senses had difficulties to identify the woman in the darkness.<br>He pulled her by the arm and continued with it into his dressing room, where he sat Madam Octa back in her cage.  
>Then he turned to the woman. "It is alright, the spider is gone." As a precaution, he threw a cloth over the cage.<br>The woman had opened her eyes again though, but was still staring at him so scared that Larten had to laugh: "You can now breathe again!"  
>The woman took a breath.<br>Larten laughed softly again. He pointed to his chair: "Please sit down."  
>Gillian was still dazed.<br>She had noticed only marginal, that the man had pulled her off the stage.  
>What had happened?<br>Heart pounding, she realized that she was now alone with him in his dressing room.  
>She sat down slowly and stared at the man.<br>From close up, he looked even more intriguing. His skin was so white and his eyes had a strange glow. Her heart began to pound when she saw that the man looked at her interested.  
>"What have you just done on stage?"<br>"I do not know ... I've done something?"  
>"Yes. You've summoned a darkness."<br>Gillian stared at him open-mouthed. Was the man crazy? "Why have you brought me here?"  
>"In my dressing room?"<br>"No, in the Circus."  
>Larten Crepsley went silent. That was not good. The woman was looking for a meaning for living. She sought that meaning from him.<br>"Can you remember anything that happened on stage?"  
>Gillian frowned.<br>What had happened?  
>She had wished herself away, away from the gaze of the audience. She had imagined, she would be covered in darkness and nothing and no one can harm her.<br>But could she say this to the strange man?  
>"I ...", Gillian hesitated. "I imagined myself being covered in darkness."<br>"Do you do that often?"  
>"Sometimes", Gillian muttered embarrassed.<br>The vampire looked at the woman fascinated. He rubbed a hand over the scar on his face as he did so often, when he had to think.  
>"I have invited you into the circus, because this is a place for people who find no other place in life."<br>Gillian looked up at him, and her eyes glistened.  
>"In the Cirque du Freak travels outcasts, the homeless, the crippled, the orphans, adventurers in search for the meaning of life, and people with special talents."<br>Gillian's heart began to pound.  
>"I think you have a very special talent."<br>Gillian quickly stood up and built up in front of Larten Crepsley.  
>"Does that mean ... Does that mean, you offer me to go with you? I mean, with the circus?"<br>The vampire looked at her thoughtfully. Why not?  
>He nodded.<br>Gillian was beaming. Her heart pounded to her throat.  
>"Does that mean you are interested?"<br>"Yes!"  
>"This means that you have to leave your job, your friends and your family behind. We'll be traveling a lot. "<br>"No problem," Gillian said quickly. "I have nothing of it."  
>"No family?"<br>Gillian shook her head.  
>Excellent, thought the vampire.<br>"Then you go and pack up your things. But remember, we travel light. Tomorrow night the Cirque du Freak will leave. "  
>Gillian nodded eagerly. Before she left, she turned around to him once more and promised: "Thank you, Mr. Crepsley. I will not disappoint you. "<p>

"You've invited me into the circus, because I had conjured up darkness on stage ", Gillian remembered.  
>They were in their tent and Gillian tried to find out what had caused the vampire fifteen years ago to take her with him.<br>"It was quite extraordinary, Gillian. You were still human. "  
>Gillian frowned.<br>She had never thought about it.  
>She felt as if she had the ability to merge with the shadows only developed when she had gained halfvampiric blood.<br>But now she remembered that this was not true.  
>There had previously been something.<br>As a child, the shadows had already whispered to her.  
>Larten walked over to his chair and sat down.<br>Thoughtfully he rubbed his forehead and pondered long before he asked: "Have you ever heard anything of the _Queen of Air and Darkness?"_  
>"<em>The Queen of Air and Darkness<em>? No ... what's that?"  
>"An old legend."<br>The vampire drummed his fingers on the armrest.  
>"A very old legend, almost forgotten. They say, she was a sorceress. And she had followers, the so-called "<em>Shadowdancers<em>". About the Queen has survived not much knowledge, but it is said about her followers, that they can conjure up a darkness, that could burn vampires on contact, such as sunlight. This ability makes vampires speak until today in fear of the _Shadowdancers_, even though they existed centuries ago and no one is left who claims to have seen them."  
>"Shadows, burning like sunlight?" A shiver ran down Gillians spine.<br>Larten nodded.  
>Gillian remembered, that she had summoned darkness and formed it into a weapon that burned Murlough. The point of the shoulder where she had hit him, had smoked, and looked as if burned.<br>Like burns from sunrays.  
>Gillian's hands began to tremble.<br>"Darren said he had seen, how you attacked Murlough with a kind of shadow whip."  
>Lartens dark eyes darted at his former student.<br>"Yes ...", she breathed. "I have not done this intentionally ... I was just defending myself. I did not know what effect it might have ... Larten! ", she knelt down at the feet of the vampire, and took his hand. "What is this power?"  
>He looked down at her hands, without taking them.<br>"I do not know. I've been watching you all these years. I have seen your strength became more formed. I was not going to make you into a vampire, before I have presented you to the vampire princes. I was not sure what would become of you… "  
>"Become of me?", Gillian cried indignantly and pulled her hand away. "What will become of me? I have myself under control. "<br>"You almost became a Vampaneze," growled the master vampire. "Do you call that, you have yourself in control?"  
>Gillian made a face. "Not the blood makes one a Vampaneze, but his deeds. You've said that yourself! Vampaneze and vampires have been once the same. Some had stopped to kill and the others not. Once you've killed yourself to drink! "<br>Larten was furious. "And yet it is the blood of our Master, which shapes us! You have experienced the transformation now! We are interconnected. Would you have wanted such a connection to Murlough?"  
>Gillian shot tears in her eyes: "Of course not. I never wanted."<br>Larten jumped up and nearly pushed her aside.  
>"How can I trust you? I've seen how you've beaten your fangs in his throat!"<br>Gillian gave way all the color from her face.  
>"That was just ... I just defended myself. He bit me! I saw no other way to kill him!"<br>Desperate, she looked up at Larten Crepsley, who looked down upon her with fury.  
>"I taught you not to fight that way! You wanted to transform! You wanted Murloughs blood!"<br>"No ...", Gillian whimpered.  
>She felt miserable and looked down at his boots.<br>"I've always wanted only yours."  
>Suddenly he grabbed her hair and forced her head up so she had to look him in the eyes: "Then swear it," he growled.<br>Gillian swallowed.  
>"Swear that you will always be on my side."<br>Gillian looked up at him, eyes burning.  
>"I am yours, Larten. I have always been yours."<br>The words had impact.

Lartens grip softened.  
>Nevertheless, he said: "I pray that the day will never come, when I must remind you of this oath."<br>He did let go of her hair.  
>Gillian took his hand and pressed her lips on them.<br>"And I pray that the day will come when I can proof you my loyalty."  
>Larten pulled her up on her feet.<br>The vampire and his former student now stood facing each other.  
>"I killed Murlough, Gillian."<br>"You had no choice."  
>Larten Crepsley looked worried.<br>He rubbed the back of his hand over the scar and involuntarily Gillian touched her chest. The scars that Murloughs claws had given her ached.  
>Larten put a hand around her shoulder and pulled her into his arms.<br>Gillian put her head on his chest with a sigh.  
>She listened to his soft heartbeat.<br>For a while the two were standing there together in silence.  
>Larten drove his hand gently through her hair.<br>"Why did you never let me go on stage in the circus? Did you want to keep my ability as a secret? ", Gillian asked.  
>The vampire nodded. "Yes. I had never seen anything like it, and I have investigated. It was not easy to find out, but I heard about the legends of the <em>Shadowdancers<em>. I had already made you into a halfvampire, and now I feared to have committed a mistake."  
>Gillian laughed softly. "And I thought you found me not good enough to make me perform in public. I've been practicing all nights long, to get better! "<br>"I know," said the vampire contrite. "I should have let you know. But the practice was not bad for you. "  
>"No, not bad," growled Gillian again, and pressed her face into the fabric of his waistcoat.<br>"I was afraid that the vampaneze might have interest in you."  
>Now Gillian looked up at him. "You've never said that!"<br>"Forgive me my weak heart. I did not want to scare you. Also, I was afraid you could switch sides. That's why I was so beside myself when I saw you with Murlough ... "  
>"Was that what you meant?" Gillian looked up at him wide-eyed.<br>"Hm?" Larten did not understand what she was referring to.  
>"That's what you said to me when I have gone away with Gavner Purl! <em>Forgive me my weak heart. <em>You... wanted not to lose me to someone else?"  
>Larten Crepsley looked contrite. "Certainly I did not want that. But back then I meant something else."<br>"What?" Gillian head already buzzed by now.  
>What else had been a reason against her, to not make her a vampire?<br>Larten took a deep breath.  
>He strode the delicate vampiress tenderly over the silky black hair, and looked at her sadly. "I can not give your life a sense."<br>Gillian furrowed her brow blankly.  
>"You have seen no meaning in your life as a human, and your life as a halfvampire also appeared meaningless for you."<br>Gillian wanted to protest, but Larten interrupted her.  
>"Yes, Gillian, your only goal was to become a vampire. But I'm sorry to have to tell you that nothing will change. Years, decades, centuries will pass and you will find no meaning. The eternity that was given to you, makes everything worse. You now do not believe me, you are young and everything still seems exciting and thrilling to you. But one day you will see the futility of it all. I can not give you any answers, Gillian. I could not at that time on the bridge, and I can not now. The day will come, when you will curse Larten Crepsleys blood in your veins."<br>Gillian wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled at him with moist eyes.  
>"That's it? That is why you didn`t wanted to make me a vampire ...?"<br>Larten swallowed. "Mostly, yes. I did not want to do this to you. "  
>"Larten ...", Gillian whispered. Finally she understood everything. "You fool!"<br>The vampire frowned.  
>"Our existence has no meaning, Gillian. The only thing waiting for you and me, is a violent death. Not even to die peaceful in our sleep is granted to us."<br>Gillian took the furrowed face of the old vampire in both hands and pulled him close.  
>"But I see a few things that are worth living for."<br>She kissed Larten tenderly.  
>The vampire did not respond initially. Then his lips went soft and he answered the kiss slowly.<br>After a while Gillian broke away from him, and grinned at him.  
>It sparkled in the eyes of the old vampire.<br>He cleared his throat. "The sun rises soon."  
>Gillian could feel it, too.<br>Larten looked at his coffin. "We have to get you an own coffin, soon."  
>Gillian took his hand and pulled him over to his coffin.<br>She smiled mischievously as she pushed the lid aside, and began to climb in.  
>"That's no rush for it."<br>Larten Crepsley grinned wryly and climbed next to the vampiress in the coffin.  
>The lid closed over the two, while orange light appeared on the horizon, the sun rose and the Cirque du Freak slowly came to life.<p>

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To be continued ...

The Vampires student Part III: "Vampire Mountain"

OUT NOW ! .net/s/7914575/1/The_Vampires_Student_Part_III_Vampire_Mountain


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